


Frigid

by HadenXCharm



Series: Melted [1]
Category: Bleach
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst, Biting, Blow Jobs, Bottoming, Boys' Love, Confessions, Cuddling & Snuggling, Explicit Language, Explicit Sexual Content, First Time Blow Jobs, First Time Bottoming, Hurt/Comfort, Ice Play, Kissing, Lemon, Locked In, Love Confessions, M/M, Male Slash, Mild Kink, Porn, Relationship(s), Romance, Sexual Coercion, Sexual Content, Sexual Inexperience, Slash, Smut, Stuck in the freezer, Yaoi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-19
Updated: 2015-04-10
Packaged: 2018-03-18 13:38:19
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 22,099
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3571634
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HadenXCharm/pseuds/HadenXCharm
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>They say that water retains heat for ages, but getting it there takes time. How is Renji supposed to get someone as standoffish as Ichigo to warm up to him? Meanwhile, Ikkaku has a soft spot for his coworker, Yumichika, but was unable to withstand his frosty attitude and became bitter in return. Their worst nightmare would be being enclosed in a small space together...</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

_Brr, it's kinda' chilly in here._

* * *

There Yumichika sat across from him, chewing gum and filing his nails like he hadn't a care in the world, that bastard. Ikkaku just scowled at him when Yumichika caught him staring and raised an eyebrow. A bratty little bastard _,_  that's what he was.

Working with the guy drove him absolutely nuts because he was so fucking annoying, but at the same time, Ikkaku hated it even more because he  _couldn't_  hate him. He was just so damn good-looking that all those cons still had a hard time deterring Ikkaku's feelings. If only the snob could just shut his mouth for a while, maybe then Ikkaku could like him more.

He'd tried to ask Yumichika out before, of course. He'd tried, and failed, not realizing that he had a reputation for turning people down. Ever since then, Yumichika had seemed to make it his duty to get on his nerves, to make the rejection sting even more. He hadn't an ounce of kindness or mercy in his body, at least not where Ikkaku was concerned. He was just so mean and preyed upon every weakness, like a vulture.

"You know you're doing that out loud, right?" Yumichika suddenly asked, having finished his pinkie nail and stood up. His lunch break was over. Ikkaku looked up in surprise, realizing he'd been breathing through his mouth.

"Geez,  _sorry_ ," he said heatedly, not sounding the least bit sorry, because well, he  _wasn't_. If he was so unbearable to be around then he might as well make things more difficult for that jerk.

"Wow. Mouth-breathing. It would take quite a good deal to prove to me that you're even remotely intelligent," Yumichika grumbled, rolling his eyes and tossing his hair. Little bitch. It made Ikkaku want to grab him – half to kiss him, half to choke the fuck out of him.

"It's a good thing we don't work outside together, or my beautiful eyes would go blind from the sun reflecting off your head." He hadn't said the  _b-word,_ but it still got Ikkaku beyond pissed. No, pissed was a speck in the distance. Ikkaku was  _murderous._

"Get the fuck out of here, then!" Ikkaku shouted, throwing the newspaper he'd been reading at him. Yumichika left, slamming the door unnecessarily and stomping away. Little brat. Ikkaku's face turned red with rage, and he buried his head in his arms on top of the employee lounge table. Ugh. Why couldn't Yumichika just  _like_  him?

Sure, Ikkaku could try to be  _nice_ , but it was so hard when Yumichika picked at him all the time. No, being nice wasn't an option, sadly enough. It had been when they'd first met. Ikkaku had fallen head over heels for that pretty face and he'd been sweetly stupid, chatting with Yumichika and hanging around him, finally getting the guts to ask him out, only to have it thrown back in his face. Damnit.

After that cold rejection and the kick in the balls Yumichika had given to his feelings, was it any wonder that Ikkaku had gotten bitter? He could've accepted Yumichika turning him down, but Yumichika had ground salt and lemon juice into the wound, and on top of that, he repeatedly tore off the scab. Fucking bastard. He really was enjoying Ikkaku's pain, wasn't he?

They couldn't work together, because even in front of their clients, they couldn't stop arguing. God, Ikkaku could only imagine what would happen if they had to be at the front cash registers all day together. He'd be pulling Yumichika's hair and Yumichika would have his head under a staplegun...

Why did Yumichika hate him now? They'd been, ya' know, sort of  _friends_  when Ikkaku had been floating around him all dreamy-eyed, but now,  _now_  Yumichika had made it his duty to wedge his self-esteem in a fruit compress.

If he had to see that smug grin one more time, oh, he would  _murder_  him! Ikkaku was never nice to  _anyone_  and he'd been trying so hard when they'd first met. Didn't Yumichika appreciate that? How could he just feel  _nothing?_  Was he really that cold-hearted?

Ikkaku had just been unlucky enough to fall for a complete asshole, and now he was paying for it. Repeatedly. Without fail. Every hour of every day. God, Yumichika's tongue was sharp.

Sometimes Ikkaku felt like punching him, but that would get him nowhere. He'd get fired, Yumichika might get a restraining order on him, and then he wouldn't even get to  _see_  him anymore.

No, it was best that they just kept arguing like this. He didn't see any other solution, at least.

Ikkaku gave a belabored sigh, scratching at a dirt speck on the table. He should probably get to work unloading those trucks…

* * *

"Ugh," Ichigo grumbled, going to the fridge. "God, it's hot outside." Having no air conditioning, Renji had been passed out on top of his bed for the past few hours, shirtless and covered in damp towels. Meanwhile, Ichigo was left to bear the heat wave himself, sweating uncomfortably in a t-shirt and jeans.

He had come home from his college campus only a little while ago.  _They_  had air conditioning, thank god, but even ten minutes after leaving, the heat was already taking a toll on him. Part of him was glad that Renji was closed in his room while he was half-undressed, because he didn't have to get even more hot and bothered staring at his sweaty gleaming torso.

Oh,  _why_  did his roommate have to be hot?  _Attractive-_ hot?

It was too bad that Ichigo wasn't gay. No way, he wasn't. Ichigo nodded firmly. He wasn't some pansy-ass fucker, or a pansy ass-fucker, or… never mind. He just... enjoyed looking at Renji, sometimes. That didn't make him  _gay._

That was why he'd turned Renji down when he'd asked him on a date. I mean, they were already roommates, right? And Ichigo didn't want to take that up to  _living together_  right away. Just because they'd known each other for so long didn't mean that they should take a huge step like that, right? He'd done the right thing. He wasn't gay. Just because he looked at Renji sometimes didn't mean that he wanted to change his whole life around and 'come out' or something. Besides, Renji just wanted him for one thing, probably. It was best that they just stay friends.

Renji hadn't seemed crushed at all when Ichigo had turned him down, and that had told Ichigo that he'd made the right decision. He wanted to be  _boyfriends,_  not friends with benefits.

"Ohhh saaaay, can you seeee?" Ichigo growled lowly as Renji's stereo turned on. Freaking  _again?_ They definitely should've gotten out of the house today. Renji got weird when he was bored. He was already lazy, and a hot, lazy, bored Renji would certainly be unreasonable and hard to deal with. "Everyone is d-"

"Shut the fuck up!" he shouted, slamming the fridge as he got out his sandwich ingredients.

"I'm never ever wrooonnng, and that's all you'll ever-"

"Turn that shit off!" Ichigo shouted again. He swore if Renji played that dumb song one more time, he was gonna' kill that dumbass and then let him listen to it in hell. Ichigo growled to himself when Renji turned the volume down so he could make his sandwich in peace.

Peanut butter, banana, and…  _toast!_

 _'Take that, Renji! You can't ruin my day!'_ Ichigo just pouted for a while. It was  _so_  hot today. What kind of an idiot didn't want to go to the beach or the pool or the  _park_ , for God's sake? They could go for a drive and bug Ikkaku at his job or something, but  _no_. Renji didn't even want to move. The lazy-ass. It was so hot, why didn't Renji wanna' hang out?

Ichigo shrugged. "Guess I have ta' beat the heat myself." Opening the freezer door, he stuck his hand in the ice-tray and pulled out an icecube. Immediately he gave a relieved sigh as the intense cold ran over the skin of his palm. He ran it over his cheek and down the front of his chest, and then the back of his neck.

"Shit!" he cursed as the ice cube started melting and slipped out of his hand, going down the back of his shirt. Flailing wildly and trying to reach it, he only succeeded in getting it stuck down his gym-shorts, inside his underwear, no less. What a stupid thing to do. "AAAH!" It was so fucking cold, he couldn't even stand it. His skin was too feverish to take this, and not thinking about anything but getting the ice  _out,_  he frantically pulled his shorts down, sticking his hands in his boxer-breifs.

"Hey man, are there any popsic-" Renji stopped dead. "Oh," he said blandly, eyes open wide as he watched Ichigo flip out and try to get his pants back on, still trying to get the ice out of his drawers.

Finally the ice just melted all the way, leaving his legs and back wet, his underwear sticking to his skin. Now that the sharp cold was gone, the air felt nice on the wet patches of his skin, but what wasn't so comfortable was the blinding heat rising in his face.

He expected Renji to start laughing at him, the big jerk, so he just crossed his arms tightly, his shirt sticking to his wet chest in a mix of cold water and sweat. "I got ice in my clothes. It was just an accident. Stop laugh-" he trailed off when he saw that Renji wasn't laughing at all, but still staring at him wide-eyed, sweaty and shirtless, wearing loose shorts.

Ichigo just about had a heart attack when he saw he'd pitched a tent. "Oh, gross, dude, what the fuck?!" Renji frowned, jeering at him and pushing him aside to get to the freezer.

Ichigo  _had_ been approached by Renji before, but he had said 'no'. However, just the thought of them being together had wormed its way through Ichigo's mind, and the idea had grown on him. He hadn't known that he'd let it get this out of control, but damn, he wanted Renji. He, he didn't know _why_ , or what he wanted to do, but he just felt like he needed to  _touch_  him, you know? He just didn't want to wake up the next morning and have it mean nothing.

Worst of all, he'd thought that Renji had moved on, that he didn't find him attractive anymore, but this just went to show that Renji still wanted him. Ichigo didn't know how to react to that. Renji was turned on by him? Did that mean he liked him? What should he say? Maybe they should kiss or something. Or go on a milkshake date, in secret, of course.

"Dumb ass," Renji growled, giving Ichigo a nice view of the rivers of moisture beading between his bare shoulder blades, turning his tattoos even darker than normal against his tan skin. Ichigo swallowed hard as Renji grabbed a grape popsicle and stuck it farther in his mouth than necessary.

As Renji turned back around, there was a steely resolve in his eyes, and Ichigo saw that he had an icecube in his hand, which he slapped into a dishtowel. Ichigo watched him warily as Renji took a step closer to him. "What are you doing?" he asked lowly, his face still pink and sweaty from embarrassment and heat stroke. Worse than that was that his eyes wouldn't stop flicking down to Renji's bulging chest. His stomach was gleaming from sweat, making each individual muscle even more pronounced. Ichigo gulped.

"Heh', my eyes are up here."

Ichigo got flustered, not knowing how to reply. Shoot, Renji had seen him? He'd seen him blatantly and obviously staring? What could he say to that?

"Let's mess around," Renji said bluntly after taking the popsicle out of his mouth and trying to lean in to kiss him, cornering him against the counter. Ichigo reflexively pushed him back, retreating to the living room. All he'd wanted was a damn sandwich and some peace and quiet! Would Renji just put some fucking clothes on already?

"Aw, c'mon, where ya' goin'?" Renji called lecherously, making Ichigo cringe and think about locking himself in his room. He had to get away from these weird feelings so that he didn't have to think about them or acknowledge that they were there. Things had progressed too fast. He didn't really know if he wanted what Renji was asking. His body was saying yes, but his heart was pounding so fast and telling him to think things over first. His brain, oh geez, it was just screaming ' _quick, jump out the window!'_

Maybe he should-

"Eep!" Renji had snagged him by the back of his damp shirt and pulled him against his hard moist chest, erection grinding into his ass shamelessly. Ichigo's eyes were wide open, stricken, but he didn't try to escape, standing stock still as if this might last longer if he didn't move even a single micron.

"Mmm," Renji groaned, wrapping a muscled arm around Ichigo's middle to keep him from escaping, molding his muscled torso to Ichigo's back, his hips pressing into him hard. Ichigo just stood there, scandalized and excited, turned on by the uncertainty of what was progressing like one of his nighttime fantasies. How could Renji just be so bold like that? Didn't he ever get nervous?

Renji gave a low laugh, hooking a finger into the front of Ichigo's shorts and pulling them open an inch, peeking down over his shoulder. Ichigo gasped and elbowed him in the gut, whipping around and letting one foot slide back, ready to retreat. "What the fuck are you doing?!" he snapped.

Renji snickered, doing it again, grabbing the front of Ichigo's pants and underwear, pulling them open wide enough that he could take a look inside. "Stop it! Don't look," Ichigo growled, shoving him back, but Renji didn't let go, the elastic of Ichigo's pants forcing him forward into Renji's arms.

"C'mon, it's a lazy day. Let's have a little fun," Renji purred in his ear, licking a salty stripe from his neck to his ear, causing Ichigo to shudder and lose the steam of his resistance. Immediately the air felt nice against that cool wet line, and he found his hands were against Renji's hard chest, which excited him to no end.

"No," he still said with a shake of his head, not really moving to leave or get away. Renji just held him, pursing his lips in thought, their faces close as he took an obscene lick of that popsicle, looking in Ichigo's eyes. Ichigo turned red, "Uhk, gross, man," he complained, knowing fully well what Renji was suggesting.

"No?" Renji asked with a patronizing frown, puckering out his lower lip like a child. "Whatsa' matter? Looks like ya' like it. You don't know how long I've been waiting for this," he whispered in Ichigo's ear, causing him to get tingles all the way down his spine.

Ichigo stood there, considering it for a moment, Renji's breath in his ear, his hot sweaty body against him. "Hmmm," he mused, looking down at Renji's hard-on and then his own, blushing a little when Renji's grin turned wolfish. "Nope," he said quickly. "I don't want to." He crossed his arms, sticking his chin in the air as if he had the willpower of a block of steel. He took a step away and Renji turned him to face him. Ichigo retreated backwards another step.

"What if I just make you feel good," Renji suggested, popping the ice in his mouth and using his newly freed hand to grab Ichigo's erection, using his grip to tow him forward back into his embrace. Ichigo let out a gasp, unsure as he looked to Renji's face. "We don't have to do it," Renji promised, grinning. "It's not serious. Just some fun. It'll be fine, man."

It was beyond Ichigo's fantasies, all his sweetest dreams, but it just didn't sound right in his ears when Renji said it out loud like that. Renji didn't like him. Renji didn't think about him when he was at work and he didn't think of jokes to tell him. Renji just wanted to play; he didn't  _care_. It was disappointing, but Ichigo couldn't deny that he wanted this. He wanted those rough arms that he wrestled against to hold him down as they rolled around in bed together. He wanted to melt Renji's chisled visage into one of pleasure and sweetness. Maybe not only that. Maybe he just wanted Renji to care about him more than anyone else.

This might be all he was going to get though, so with pink cheeks and uncertainty, Ichigo shyly looked at his toes as Renji groped him. "... Okay." Renji gave a low laugh of satisfaction, towing him back into the kitchen and hoisting him up on the counter, chucking the rest of his popsicle in the sink to melt away.

Ichigo smiled a little bit when Renji grinned roguishly and pressed his body against his, getting inbetween his legs and wrapping arms around him, touching him everywhere and pulling at his t-shirt as they kissed. Ichigo made a small noise, slowly linking his legs around Renji's back, running his fingers over Renji's hair and down his neck.

Renji groaned lowly as he took two handfuls of Ichigo's ass, pulling him forward against his erection, grinding hard. It made Ichigo nervous, but he kept his eyes closed as Renji's thick wet tongue swiped over his lips, urging his mouth to open wider. "Hn," he whined as his mouth was invaded, "ah." God, Renji was biting his lower lip and tugging on it, and sucking on his tongue. Holy shit, he couldn't keep up.

"Hn-hn," Renji laughed as he pulled back, causing Ichigo to smile nervously. Part of Ichigo had always dreamt of Renji seducing him and luring him in, but he'd expected it to be more romantic, requiring more persuasion. Lacking that now, it was just a competition and Renji was holding this over his head. He had to make Renji feel good too or this jerk would be beating him!

He grabbed Renji's hair roughly by the base of his ponytail, yanking his head back in and surging his slimmer chest against Renji's. Renji gave a surprised groan, eagerly returning it and picking him up, hitching him on the side of his hip effortlessly, like a kid. Ichigo frowned darkly as Renji opened the freezer again, popping some ice in his mouth and bringing a few more pieces with him in the handtowel.

Something primal inside of Ichigo just  _basked_  in pleasure as Renji kicked open his bedroom door and threw him down on the bed. Renji laughed lowly, pouncing on him and running his big hands up his chest. Not wanting Renji to be on top, Ichigo grabbed Renji's shoulders and locked his legs over his back, bucking upwards and flipping them over. Renji grinned widely as Ichigo's hands pinned down his large arms, and to Ichigo's surprise, Renji didn't fight it.

Finding that he was straddling the older man, he suddenly didn't know what to do now, losing confidence now that Renji was at his mercy. They were in Renji's room, and Ichigo just wanted to bury his face in the bed and smell it, but he felt too far out of his comfort zone. He hadn't thought this plan out far enough, and Renji could see his uncertainty, smirking at him.

Even after only a moment of faltering, Renji noticed and picked at him, smirking widely. Ichigo couldn't stand that fucking  _smirk._ "Nervous?" Ugh, that made Ichigo so mad.

"Tch, you wish!" he shouted, punching Renji in the chest, only causing him to laugh at him more. "Shut your mouth!" he snapped, leaning down and kissing him hard but with little skill. He bit Renji's lip like he'd done to him earlier, and that seemed to get Renji really riled up, because Ichigo could feel his erection swelling up between them.

Renji panted against his mouth then, arms surging upwards and grabbing Ichigo's wrists, pinning him beneath him again. Not liking having the tables turned on him, Ichigo just lay there in nervous surprise as Renji groaned hungrily. Gritting his teeth as Renji's hands held him down, he felt the hot air between them cause even more sweat to bead on his skin. Renji licked his chest through his shirt, tongue teasing his nipple and biting, causing Ichigo to flip out a little.

"No! Ah," he whined, pausing in his attempts at resisting as Renji sucked hard, then coming back up to his lips before Ichigo could catch his breath.

"Kiss me," Renji said with a grin, laying his heavy half-naked body down on top of Ichigo, rocking their hips together. Ichigo gasped, cheeks turning red as Renji's tongue entered his mouth again, swirling around his own more slowly than before. Renji let out a low masculine noise that just made Ichigo's mind go ' _yes'_ , and his back arched. His body started seizing up as his deepest urges fought with each other. This was wrong. This was too much for him, but he was so curious. He wanted to keep touching, but he didn't want to deal with the aftermath.

Before he knew what was happening, Renji had backed up a little and grabbed the sides of his shorts, yanking them down his legs with a quick  _shuck_. Things had progressed from the front gate to the doorstep quicker than Ichigo could've blinked. Not having time to react, he just watched, mortified as Renji took his hair down and leaned down slowly, breathing over the bulge in Ichigo's underwear. Oh, Ichigo just  _shuddered_ seeing his mouth so close.

Licking a long slow stripe over the front of the material, Ichigo let out a little moan, starting to relax and smile. Oh, that felt good. Renji laughed lowly, the vibrations running through his big chest and giving a pleasant buzz against Ichigo's arousal. "Ya' like that?" he asked, his deep voice causing Ichigo's gut to clench up. At that moment, Ichigo wanted to surrender everything and let Renji have his way with him, no matter how many years he'd have to live with the humiliation afterwards.

The thick muscles in Renji's neck and shoulders tensed slightly as he leaned back down and mouthed at the front of his boxer-breifs, nipping and sucking teasingly, leaving Ichigo a shuddering mess. He grinned dazedly, eyes bleary as he watched Renji's mouth move over him. Renji wasn't shy of making eye contact, it seemed.

When Renji ran an icecube over the front of his crotch, Ichigo came back to reality. "Hey!" he shouted, half-sitting up, because that had been a real shock. The hair all over his body was standing on end, and he was surprised to see goose-bumps rising on his arms. It was stiflingly hot and humid in this room, but he had just gotten  _chills_  over his whole body.

Renji just gave him a devious look and pulled up the front of his underwear, pulling Ichigo's erection out. At the direct touch to his privates, Ichigo gasped, body locking up. "Don't look!" he shouted, mortified, but Renji just made a sultry noise, licking his lips and then up the back of his dick, never breaking eye contact.

"Ah, don't-" Ichigo choked out as Renji took the head into his mouth, sucking and swirling his tongue, completely melting him into a shaking puddle. "Ahhh," he sighed, laying back down with a dazed smile, eyes closing as Renji gave a low laugh, vibrating his shaft just right.

"Hm? You like that?" Renji asked teasingly as he sucked up the side of his dick and placed a teasing kiss on the tip, snaking his tongue along the slit. Ichigo just nodded, humming in bliss as Renji ran his hands over his body. Now that he was distracted, he hardly noticed when Renji pulled his underwear halfway down his thighs, bobbing his head as he wormed his hands inbetween his legs.

"Hey, get outta' there," he jolted, squirming madly until Renji's fingers retreated. Renji shrugged, sucking and twisting his head, playing with Ichigo's balls with his big fingers. "Yeah," he hissed, the base of his dick tightening up. He'd never felt something so good.

Renji pulled back for a moment and Ichigo gave out a pleased sigh, smiling lazily as he felt his hot breath puff against his wet crotch. Taken by surprise when something searingly cold was in Renji's mouth the next time he returned, Ichigo sat bolt-upright, trying to drag Renji's head back, overtaken by the combination of the ice burning against his skin and the warm tongue soothing it.

"S- St- Ah," Ichigo stuttered, moaning and twitching as he watched Renji work his magic. Seeing that it was too much for his younger counterpart, Renji retreated, crunching the ice between his teeth.

"Heh'," Renji laughed as he pulled back, laying down on his back with an arm tucked behind his head. "Get ta' work, squirt," he teased, pointing at his own crotch. Ichigo let out a surprised and sickened noise, sitting up.

"Eh? No way!"

"What, did you think that was for free?" Renji inquired with a mean grin, grabbing Ichigo's hair and pulling his head down as he tried to get away. "Get goin'," he said, pulling his dick out and putting Ichigo's hand on it.

Ichigo didn't know what to say, eyes bugging out as Renji just exposed himself so nonchalantly. Seeing the dark tattoos beneath his fingers was so erotic that he just about fainted. Everything in his being was telling him to let go and get the fuck out of here, but he couldn't shake the feeling that this opportunity might not come easily again. Renji was so… He was all sweaty, his tattoos gleaming, his muscular chest and stomach bare for him to enjoy, and he had basically  _invited_  him to touch him.

It wasn't quite the same as in Ichigo's fantasies. Renji was giving him an annoying smirk and would be watching his every move, which was quite uncomfortable indeed. On the other hand, if he backed down, Renji would never let him forget it.

So with burning cheeks and a thousand watt scowl, Ichigo scootched closer and touched Renji's chest awkwardly, feeling his tattoos and rubbing his stomach a little. Apparently, it wasn't doing anything for Renji, who just gave him an indifferent look from beneath those half-lidded eyes. Ichigo scowled deeper when Renji jeered and gave him a smirk. "Che'. Don't tell me ya' don't know what ta' do," Renji said with a snicker that got Ichigo so fucking mad. "Need me ta' tell ya' what ta' do next?"

"No way!" Ichigo shouted, infuriated and so embarrassed that he could drop dead. He would wipe that smirk right off Renji's face. "I'll make you cum!" he said, coughing when it came out louder than he'd meant. He didn't take it back, just glaring as Renji gave him a shit-eating grin that said 'no, you won't.' How dare Renji doubt his skills!

He gripped Renji's erection hard and spat into his other hand when the sweaty skin grated against his palm. Renji's breathing pattern barely hitched, but Ichigo still noticed, speeding up and trying to twist his wrist. Damn, it was a lot harder to jerk off someone else.

"You're gonna' have to do better than that," Renji said, sounding pleased with himself. Ichigo growled when he saw that Renji had better control of his body than he did. He was getting nowhere. Cheeks aflame, he leaned down hesitantly, opening his mouth and letting saliva hang off his tongue down onto the head of Renji's cock. "Mmm, yeah, suck my dick," Renji hummed in encouragement, putting a hand on the back of Ichigo's head to pull him down, but Ichigo slapped him away.

"Don't help me," he snapped, glaring at Renji, who just shrugged and gave a 'che', putting his hands behind his head like the jerk he was. He was gonna' just lounge there and look bored while Ichigo suffered; what a bastard. Ichigo took a few breaths to steel his resolve before leaning down, hand still doing its best to bring Renji to his knees.

Just as he was considering actually doing it, he got the horrible feeling that he was being watched. Looking up, his gut clenched up in aggravation when Renji just gave him a smug grin. That bastard was fully enjoying his embarrassment. Ichigo exhaled sharply and stuck out his tongue, licking the head of his cock testingly. He'd show that jerk. He could do well and then Renji wouldn't want to be with anyone else.

Renji laughed lowly as Ichigo relaxed his mouth to fit him inside. Still, Renji wasn't moaning or begging like he had, he wasn't panting hard or hissing in pleasure. Ichigo tried harder, sucking down as far as he could, which was only a few inches. "Yeah, that's it, keep trying," Renji mumbled with a yawn, his hand coming to the back of Ichigo's head again, resting there and rubbing through his hair.

Ichigo kept his eyes to himself, not able to bear seeing Renji's smug face as he appreciated the view. Out of the corner of his vision, up the landing strip of red hair beneath Renji's bellybutton, he could see Renji licking his lips.

Trying his best, Ichigo kept one hand at the base of Renji's erection, attempting to go deeper and deeper with each bob of his head, marking his progress when the tattoos on Renji's dick got darker with his saliva. He'd make this idiot want him. He could do it. He'd make Renji ask him to be his again.

"You're pretty bad at this, man," Renji finally said awkwardly, patting Ichigo's head. "It's okay, you tried. You can stop," he offered. Ichigo backed off and shouted in his face.

"Shut up! I can do it!" Renji gave a sigh and lay there, erection pulsating in Ichigo's grip, pleasure not progressing much as Ichigo took him back in his mouth. He hoped Renji was just trying to hide that it felt good instead of actually just suffering through a bad blowjob, because Ichigo really was trying his best.

"You've gotta' use pressure, you can't just move your mouth. Suck on it," Renji explained, being less mean to Ichigo, because he'd been pretty brave to try doing this with him. He could see how nervous and embarrassed the poor kid was. It had been a nice thing to do, but it just wasn't working out. Ichigo was pretty bad at this, which was saying something, because Renji liked blowjobs almost more than sex. Mostly because of-

"Ah," he grunted when Ichigo tried to suck on him, his teeth scraping against him a little too hard. Ichigo pulled back apologetically.

"Whoops, did I bite? Sorry, man," he mumbled miserably, trying again, licking in a circle and emulating what Renji had done to him. Renji's face flushed red alarmingly quickly as the little scrape faded from his sensory memory. Already, Ichigo's tongue felt a lot better against him, sending tingles down his back. When Ichigo tried sucking harder, his comparatively smaller mouth was completely full of Renji's dick, which made it impossible for Renji to avoid being pressed up tightly against his teeth and raked with the points.

"Ahhh," he groaned deeply, arms moving from where they were resting arrogantly behind his own head. Renji's big hands locked behind Ichigo's neck, holding him down on his dick, which twitched as it slid down Ichigo's throat. Ichigo's teeth clamped down even tighter when he choked, and Renji's gut clenched up, almost lifting him off the bed as he set his jaw to keep in any more noise.

Ichigo pulled back with a gasp, coughing hard and clutching his throat, and Renji just lay there, growling and trembling slightly, a whisper of a moan leaving his mouth. Ichigo wiped his eyes of the moisture there, pissed at Renji for doing that, but immediately he saw Renji's erection hardening to its full glory, practically standing up on its own, which was impressive given its girth.

"Huh?" Ichigo mumbled lowly, seeing the sweat on Renji's brow and the flush to his cheeks. Renji looked embarrassed and pissed, like he knew he'd been caught, but at what…?

"Oh wow! Hah, I did it!" Ichigo shouted with a laugh, grinning widely. Renji crossed his arms and scowled. Ichigo cheered to himself and meanly laughed in Renji's face, causing the red-head to grab him and tow him back to his crotch.

"Yeah, yeah, just keep going," Renji said, voice strained and scratchy, and Ichigo could hear now that he was getting seriously turned on. When Ichigo didn't start immediately, Renji desperately directed his cock to Ichigo's mouth, trying to push him down to make him get going. Ichigo was still reeling that he'd finally gotten to Renji, able to give him some pleasure too. He tried even harder, holding the base of Renji's fat pulsating erection with both of his sweaty hands, sucking rhythmically even though his neck was beyond tired.

Renji let out a low breath, still trying to contain it to prove that Ichigo's skills were far too meager for him, and Ichigo knew that they were. He was okay with that, if only Renji wouldn't tease him about it. It was just so thrilling to have the larger man beneath him, even letting out a slight catch of his breath to indicate that whatever Ichigo was doing felt good. Ichigo's skills hadn't improved, but Renji's pleasure had.

Renji was trying so hard to keep quiet because he was so sensitive now that every movement of Ichigo's tongue felt great. He couldn't let this little jerk know that he was enjoying this. If he came, Ichigo would tease him so bad. No, there was no way Ichigo could get him to come anyway, there was nothing to worry about.

"Hhooo," Renji exhaled sharply, licking his teeth with a hungry groan, his hand knotting in the hair at the nape of Ichigo's neck.

Ichigo pulled back and swallowed with the tip of Renji's penis still in his mouth, having gathered too much saliva. He licked along the sensitive back of the head of his cock, running his tongue inside the slit roughly, seeing Renji's back lift off the bed as he held his breath tightly. Ichigo laughed smugly, sucking him back inside, jerking Renji off up into his mouth as his other hand made a fist at the base much too tightly, enough that it should really hurt. Renji tensed up, wincing, but the red flush to his cheeks couldn't deny a thing; Ichigo knew his game now.

"Ah, that's enough," Renji said, voice raspy and thick with pleasure. Ichigo didn't stop, digging his nails into Renji's gut, raking his flesh. Renji actually moaned then, although it was strangled because his teeth were gritted so tightly in an attempt to keep it in. "That's enough, I said," he insisted.

Ichigo braced himself, trying to relax his throat as he took him in as far as he could, biting down. "B-Baka!" Renji shouted, jolting almost into a sitting position as he held Ichigo's head there and came. Ichigo felt almost like he was throwing up, because of the spasming of his throat and the inability to draw breath, feeling liquid pouring past his tongue before he could taste it.

When Renji finally released him after his thick erection tensed in his mouth several times, Ichigo was gasping and gulping in air like a fish, coughing like a smoker and clutching his poor throat. He lay there on the bed, eyes wet and burning for about a minute and a half before he regained the power of speech.

"What the fuck were you thinking? Are you trying to kill me?" he cried, voice cracking several times as he swallowed and tried to get his breathing to return to normal. Then as he looked to Renji's crotch, and then to his face and his limp sweaty body, he realized Renji had cum down his throat. Of course, he had  _known_ , but it finally registered that he'd actually beaten Renji at this.

"Hah, awesome! I got you!" he shouted, fist-pumping the air and pointing in Renji's face, which was both satisfied and irritated. Sweat rolled down Renji's brow, and Ichigo could see bite-marks on his softening dick, which wasn't relaxing all the way back to normal. Renji's glare was dark and murderous as he sat up and knocked Ichigo onto the floor.

"Oh yeah?" he asked darkly, body still heavy and uncoordinated from the aftermath of the pleasure. Ichigo's erection jutted against the elastic of his underwear as Renji's big arms held him down.

"Yeah. I showed you," Ichigo said smugly, tipping his head up to stick his tongue out brattily. "Ha-ha," he teased. Renji just gave an infuriated growl, sputtering indignantly as he tried to come up with a comeback.

Before Ichigo knew what was happening, he was on his stomach, any bare area of his sweaty skin sticking to the stray hairs Renji had on the carpet. To his dismay, Renji's dormant crotch was grinding against his ass, and Ichigo could feel that he was serious this time.

"I'll teach you ta' laugh at me," Renji growled darkly, yanking his shorts and underwear down his kicking legs, and Ichigo yelped as he felt Renji's feet holding his ankles down, his strong hands still pinning him on his front.

"Yeah right. You're just mad because I beat you!" he antagonized further, unable to let it go, which just made Renji even angrier.

"You didn't beat nothin'!"

"What about that noise you made, huh?"

Renji shoved Ichigo's face into the carpet roughly, locking one of his arms behind his back. "You little bastard," he grit out, trying to shut up Ichigo's smug arrogant tone and wipe the grin off his face, which wasn't really working. He didn't need any crap from someone younger than him. It had just been a lucky shot, that's all. Ichigo couldn't take him down.

Getting groped by Renji's hard hot body was pleasant for about a minute, because Ichigo was still reeling that they were really fooling around like he'd been dreaming of doing. The moment Renji's saliva-wet finger ran up between his legs to a place that he'd forgotten was involved in gay sex, Ichigo swore and reflexively kicked back.

Lucky for Renji, his foot didn't land in his sore vulnerable crotch, but hit empty air, and Renji just laughed lowly, holding Ichigo's legs down with his own as he stripped Ichigo's white t-shirt off his struggling torso.

"Hm, always knew you'd be wild in bed," Renji said huskily in his ear, his confidence seeming to depend on Ichigo's nervousness.

Renji's slippery thumb pressed against his entrance, and Ichigo just lay there, stunned and in flat-out panic-mode. He heard Renji spit, feeling saliva run down his ass as Renji's fingers continued to rub over him in circles. "Stop it! Don't- Don't look there!" Ichigo shouted, yelping when he felt an ice cube running over his asshole without warning. Renji bit into the firm cheek muscle, groaning lowly as he moved the ice inbetween Ichigo's legs, sliding it down his perineum and balls, laughing as Ichigo twitched and writhed.

"Stop, it's cold! Stop," Ichigo gasped as Renji tried to push the ice inside of him. "Get off!" He arched his back and wrenched his way free, kicking Renji in the gut. Yanking his pants back on, he stood up, looking for a way out. Renji just coughed and stood up, rubbing his stomach, his eyes still hazy and dark with desire.

"I'm gonna' fuck you senseless," Renji said lowly, sending shivers down Ichigo's back. He could see that Renji meant it, and he started to get pretty scared, the hair on his neck prickling with excitement. Sadly, all Ichigo could see on Renji's face was lust, so those words held little charm to him.

"Like hell you are!" Ichigo shouted back, protectively holding the band of his shorts and backing away. Renji's face twisted into a grin as if Ichigo's attempts at resisting were cute or something.

"C'mon, what are you, a prude?" Ichigo scowled.

" _No_ ," he said vehemently, crossing his arms. Renji made a noise of mock-thought.

"Oh," he said, as if he'd figured everything out. "Poor guy," he said, as if Ichigo was absolutely pitiable. "I see. You're  _scared._ That's okay, I get it." Ichigo sputtered furiously, not knowing what to say to that, realizing exactly what Renji was trying to do. It was fucking annoying, because the manipulation was working.

"No, I'm not!"

"Why don't you prove it then?"

"I'm not stupid enough to fall for that!" Renji just nodded, agreeing with a patronizing look on his face as he waltzed closer to Ichigo and leaned into his face smugly.

"Of course you aren't. What was I thinking." Ichigo growled in irritation, fisting his hands at his sides as Renji laughed lowly, curling a finger under his chin. "C'mon. Why don't you kiss me, then?"

"No way," Ichigo spat, turning away hotly in the humid air. He needed to take a long shower. "I'd never kiss you."

"Aw, did I hurt your feelings?" Renji asked jokingly, and something inside Ichigo just snapped, because yes, Renji  _had_  hurt his feelings, and Ichigo could see now that this big jerk only wanted one thing.

If he gave in and had sex with him, all Renji was ever going to do was tease him and hold that over his head for the rest of their lives. He imagined the jerk bragging that he'd 'gotten into Ichigo's frigid little panties', and the idea made him  _seethe_  with rage.

" _Fuck_  you!" Ichigo shouted in his face, storming off and trying to deny that Renji had broken his heart. What a disappointment he'd turned out to be.

* * *

_What's this, you're shaking?_


	2. Chapter 2

_Don't be so cold._

* * *

Ikkaku hummed angrily to himself, half to calm down, half to get some of this irritation out. Hauling crates out of the back of semis for an hour had done nothing to ease his hot temper. That goddamn brat really got under his skin and  _stayed_  there.

_'Oh Yumichika, fuck you, fucking fuck you and your ability to piss me off.'_

At least it gave him something to think about when he was working his muscles dry.

"Hack and slash, and I'll rip off your arms, and feed them to a-" Stopping with his hateful made-up song, he wiped his brow, finally having finished with unloading some trucks with the other guys. God, his back hurt, but it had been a good work out.

It was a beautiful day, sure, but only if one was spending it by the pool or on the beach. Here at Home Depot, it was just fucking  _humid,_ which was awful, because now the place was just full of sweaty dudes. Ikkaku had already changed his uniform once, and he was getting sweat vats under his arms  _again._  That would just give Yumichika another thing to find fault with.

 _'Stop thinking about him. Don't feed a troll.'_ Never mind that Yumichika couldn't read his thoughts, Ikkaku still felt he had something to prove. He couldn't let that jerk tear him down, or he'd be giving him exactly what he wanted.

Looking from side to side, he hummed lowly to himself. He'd just stop by the freezer for a few minutes like he always did. He never got caught, and if he did, he wouldn't be in any trouble. It would only be for a little bit so he could grab the soda he'd left in there earlier. Then he could take an emergency wank and then go back to the employee lounge for a drink. Maybe Yumichika might even by bending over the counter to check if the microwave was still broken. Ikkaku smirked at the thought, opening the heavy door with one arm, immediately gratified with a cool blast of air on his sweaty neck and chest.

"Oh, I'm so glad you're here," came a relieved voice, and Ikkaku was confused as he saw Yumichika smiling at him, arms opening up. Was Yumichika going to  _hug_  him? He'd been entertaining thoughts of Yumichika naked and begging for it, but he hadn't been able to imagine Yumichika ever being happy to see him. Man, the heat must've gotten to his head, because this fantasy was  _batty._

"What, really?" Ikkaku asked, taken aback. Was Yumichika pulling a cruel prank on him or something? "Tch', Well,  _that's_  a surprise," he said, a little unsure, letting the door close behind him with a loud clap. Yumichika smile immediately fled from his face and to Ikkaku's confusion, he hit him ineffectually in the chest.

"You idiot!" he shouted, screaming into his hands and flopping to his knees on the cold concrete. "Ugh," he cried, moping and then falling onto the ground dramatically, curling up in a ball on his side. Ikkaku just let out a weird laugh.

"What the fuck? What's wrong?" he asked. What kind of mood swings were  _these?_

Yumichika just lay there and glared at him meanly, arms crossed as Ikkaku went across the room to grab the soda he'd come in for. Almost smugly, Yumichika watched him carry it back to the door.

"What's your problem?" Ikkaku repeated, wondering what the hell Yumichika's vendetta against him was about. Really, did he just enjoy being mean to him so he could keep rubbing that rejection in forever? What a shitty little bastard he'd fallen for.

Yumichika just glared at him as he grabbed the doorhandle and pulled on it. Since Yumichika was already in here, it looks like Ikkaku would have to jerk off somewhere else. Or at least he would, if the door would just open.

"What the fuck," Ikkaku mumbled, turning towards the door and yanking on it. The he looked to Yumichika, a sense of hilarity suddenly washing over him as Yumichika stared at him with an 'I-told-you-so' look on his face.

"Hah! You were stuck in here, you dingus!" Ikkaku shouted, bursting into laughter as he pointed at Yumichika and bent over, holding his stomach. No wonder he'd been upset. First Yumichika had been stuck in here, and things had still gotten worse, because now Yumichika was still stuck, but with  _him_  in here too. Yumichika didn't look pleased with himself anymore, glaring at him and standing up, pouting.

Ikkaku just laughed harder, seeing that he'd finally caught the little shit. Guess he wasn't as perfect as either of them had thought. Yumichika put his hands on his hips and slapped him when he laughed too close in his face. "You got stuck too!" he defended.

Ikkaku kept giggling, smirking at him, "Heh, oh no," he gloated. "You don't get to say you're better than me anymore." Yumichika frowned, crestfallen and furious as Ikkaku demolished his pedastal. "We're the same amount of stupid as each other. This proves it." Yumichika gave him an unimpressed look, crossing his arms because that hadn't been as mean as it could have been. At least Ikkaku was admitting that he'd been dumb enough to trap them both in here.

"Fine," Yumichika conceded, scowling when Ikkaku kept laughing lowly. " _Fine!_ Just shut up!" he snapped. Ikkaku finally settled down, still grinning widely at him, happy to finally have something to hold over Yumichika. He'd get him back for all those times he'd hurt his feelings and made fun of his shiny head.

"You okay?" he asked, genuinely concerned, but not letting it show in his voice. They were both in their work uniforms, which were polo shirts and orange aprons. Yumichika had goosebumps up and down his white arms, and he was noticeably shivering and holding himself. He'd probably been stuck in here for a little while already.

"You wanna' snuggle?" Ikkaku teased, opening his arms up to hold his bitter coworker. Yumichika slapped him back spitefully, snapping at him.

"Leave me alone, you jerk! I hate you!"

"Fine, fine," Ikkaku jeered, glaring at him as Yumichika went and sat in the corner, pouting by himself. If he was gonna' be such an uptight little whiner, then  _fine_ , let him.

"Go be cold then. I'll just enjoy this nice weather," he said with a sigh, because the air still felt really good against his sweaty skin, which was finally starting to cool down. He cracked open his soda and took a swig.

Tch'. Yumichika had gotten stuck in here. Ikkaku was still getting such a kick out of that, unable to keep the grin off his face. He'd been stuck in here, and now he was stuck  _with_  him, which wasn't exactly ideal for Ikkaku either, because he couldn't really jerk off anymore like he'd planned to.

Someone would come open the freezer by five. They just had to make it until then. Only three more hours.

* * *

It was almost dinner time now, and Ichigo hadn't come out of his room. It was so fucking  _hot_  today, and it just made his brooding even worse. The sweltering heat was doing absolutely nothing to calm his nerves. Ichigo didn't know if he'd ever lived through a day that was more humid. Sweat was pooling in his belly button and he was sticking to his bed.

Fuck Renji. Fuck him and his stupid animalistic heart that was completely ruled by his hormones. Renji didn't care about him. Hmph.

To be honest, Ichigo was regretting having turned Renji down those few months ago. At least then, Renji had made an effort to be nice, like proper boyfriend material. Why couldn't they go back to that? Now Renji was just some horny jerk who wasn't even attempting to hide the fact that he only wanted to have sex and then forget about it.

Okay, it wasn't like Ichigo had ever wanted Renji to be sweet to him or romantic, but god, he didn't want to be the guy's fuckbuddy. Maybe it was mean to want Renji to be pining for him when Ichigo wasn't sure about dating him, but he sort of did. Part of him wished that Renji was trying to win him over so that they could hold hands instead of have sex. If Renji wasn't absolutely crushed that Ichigo didn't want to date him, then that told Ichigo that he'd never loved him in the first place. He'd only wanted to get his clothes off all along.

Maybe this was what being an adult was like. Maybe romance was only a short interlude leading up to when one gave in to the other and did the deed, and everything after that was just grey by comparison. What a sad thought.

Ichigo gave a long sigh. He didn't want to date Renji anyway. It was just horrible of him to want Renji to be heartbroken over him, but he did. They were both awful people, weren't they. Well, this was what Ichigo got for hesitating. Now he was the one heartbroken and he wanted Renji to feel bad like him too. Misery loves company, after all.

"Hey man, I made macaroni salad. Ya' want some? It's nice and cold," Renji called through the door, seeming to be attempting to use a peace offering, because his voice was docile and tentative. Ichigo didn't answer, just rolling over in a pout. He was still mad, because he knew for it to hurt like this, he must've been in love, and if Renji wasn't hurt as well, Renji had never felt anything for him. "C'mon man, you've gotta' come outta' there. You're gonna' suffocate."

"I don't care," Ichigo called back childishly, throwing a pillow at the door. "Don't talk to me." He didn't want to look at Renji's face right now. Hearing his voice was bad enough.

"Dude, seriously?" Renji asked flatly, opening the door even though he'd obviously been attempting to be polite and respect Ichigo's privacy. "Come eat," he insisted. Ichigo was glad to see that Renji had at least put on a shirt. Sulking, he got up and went to the kitchen, getting a bowl of the food Renji had made for them.

"Why won't you look at me?" Renji asked plainly. Ichigo looked at him then, glaring harshly, eyes bloodshot. "Sheesh, never mind," Renji mumbled, going quiet as he ate.

Ichigo didn't want to deal with him anymore, leaving to sit on the couch as soon as he was done. "Dude, why are you being so cold?" Renji asked, almost sounding hurt. "Are you mad at me?" Ichigo just grunted in reply. "You think I'm a jerk?" Ichigo made another noise, and Renji gave a sigh, head flopping back on his shoulders. "It's too hot to argue today, Ichigo. Either quit being mad, or say something."

Ichigo  _didn't_  say anything, pursing his lips. Renji didn't like the silent treatment very much, although it was bearable enough. With a belabored groan, Renji raised the valid point that Ichigo had liked what they were doing and if there was a problem with it, he should  _say_  something like an adult instead of just pouting.

"What did I say that upset you?"

"Nothing," Ichigo said in a clipped tone. Renji just calmly looked to his face, waiting patiently until Ichigo sighed in defeat. It wasn't Renji's fault that he didn't have feelings for him, so he should just quit stirring the pot.

"You were moving too fast," Ichigo lied, arms crossed tightly as he reluctantly invited Renji to continue where they'd left off. He was still angry and upset that Renji didn't like him, but he supposed that it would be okay to go to bed with him just once, just to see what it would be like. He wasn't ready to let go of what had been close enough for him to taste. It wasn't as sweet now that he knew Renji felt nothing, but Ichigo could try to imagine things differently.

"You were nervous?" Renji asked, this time not teasing at all. Ichigo grumbled inwardly, not liking to let Renji think that was true, but it was better than telling him the real reason he'd gotten upset. It was just... Ichigo had been really disappointed and had taken it pretty hard.

Ichigo gave a terse nod, grinding his teeth.

"Oh," Renji said in surprise, flopping next to him on the couch, getting a little too close. Ichigo averted his eyes, shoulders rising up defensively. He had been nervous earlier, of course, but it still didn't sit right with him to let Renji think that he was some chicken and that had been why he'd fled earlier.

"You don't like the ice?" Renji asked, his cocky attitude gone, his voice serious and apologetic. Ichigo liked the change, and his heart squeezed with a surge of 'I love you'. He was going to set fire to himself. His heart was a complete and utter traitor. He couldn't start feeling like this if Renji didn't want things to be serious between them. All it could bring him was pain.

"Not really," Ichigo growled, looking down at his lap shyly as he crossed his legs and arms, winding up so tight that Renji wouldn't be able to just dive in like before. It was completely pathetic, but if Renji didn't care about him... just once, Ichigo wanted to pretend that he did. Just once, they could sleep together and Ichigo would have that feeling for the rest of his life, even if he had to endure endless teasing.

"Sorry, man," Renji said seriously, seeming truly sorry.

Ichigo shrugged, letting out a 'pssh'. "Good," Ichigo said flatly, letting his guard drop. Renji immediately grinned slyly, causing Ichigo to give an inward groan.

"Didn't mean ta' be so pushy," Renji said lightly, leaning in and biting his ear. "C'mon, gimme' a kiss," he jibed with a grin that was less smug and mean than before. Ichigo reluctantly returned the gesture, leaning into Renji's arms and lying forward on the couch with him. Immediately, he could feel that Renji's touches were a lot more subdued. Not gentle exactly, but not rough or demanding like before. Ichigo let himself believe that it was passion rather than lust this time as they kissed slowly.

Ichigo sighed into his mouth, unable to shake the disappointment and misery that this was all he would get: Renji's admittedly gorgeous body. It was too bad he couldn't jam his hand through his chest and grab his heart in his fist. ' _This is mine'_ , he'd tell him, making sure Renji knew it. He'd make sure that Renji would never share moments like this with anyone else. The thought that this was all he would have was absolutely suffocating.

Maybe it wasn't even that Ichigo wanted Renji to love him. It was just that he didn't want anyone else to have Renji now. Maybe that was selfish, but Ichigo couldn't stand the thought of Renji looking for anyone else after him. He wanted to be the only one. He wanted Renji to crave his company, his touch, and  _only_  his. Renji had to love him, he  _had_  to. If Renji didn't love him, how else could Ichigo know that he wouldn't roam?

He had to make sure Renji liked this enough that he'd never look elsewhere. Ichigo gulped, his nerves causing his stomach to tighten up. The pressure was already starting to heighten. He had to do well at this. If he didn't, it was all over.

"Wanna' move this back to the bedroom?" Renji suggested lowly, his hot sticky body heating up again under Ichigo's tentative hands. Now that Renji wasn't being so cocky and annoying, Ichigo felt free to touch him too, to explore more, to give instead of reluctantly receiving. Ichigo sat up from where he was laying on Renji's chest, giving a cautious sigh as he nodded, getting up. Renji gave a playful growl and tackled him, tickling his stomach and hurling him over his shoulder, running down the hall. Ichigo laughed, heart clenching. He'd miss this once it was over. What a sad fool he was.

As Renji set Ichigo down, his hands surged up around the taller man's shoulders and into his hair, tangling in tightly and pulling his head flush against his own so they could kiss hard. "Mmmm," Renji let out a guttural groan, laughing lowly into Ichigo's mouth as they backed up blindly onto Renji's bed. As far as Ichigo knew, Renji had never brought anyone home into this room, and it pleased him to know that Renji had no other memories of anyone else between these sheets.

Of course it was much too hot to get under the covers, and Renji had them naked before you could've said 'bread knife'. Growling and laughing deep in his chest, Renji got Ichigo on his hands and knees, pulling his pants and underwear down so he could greedily bite and squeeze his ass. Ichigo bore it silently, face in the mattress as he tried to get a handle on his nerves. Just as long as Renji's attitude wasn't as unbearable as before, he could curb his embarrassment.

After a moment of Renji having retreated, Ichigo's hot face lifted so he could tell Renji not to look at him so close. Renji made a noise of appreciation, swatting Ichigo's right buttcheek, pinching it with a small laugh. Ichigo made to move his hands between his legs to cover himself up, but Renji nudged his fingers aside, still telling him obscenely how good his ass looked.

"Ugh, don't look so close," Ichigo begged, still not understanding how Renji could want to do...  _that_  to him. He would've liked to reverse their positions for his first time, but he didn't know how Renji would react if he suggested that. "It's embarrassing."

"Trust me, you've got nothin' to be embarrassed about," Renji hissed in appreciation of the view. Ichigo made an unsure noise as Renji spread his legs apart, grabbing his ass and pushing both cheeks as far to the side as he could, spitting. Then, to Ichigo's disbelief and utter horror, Renji stuck out his tongue and licked him firmly, circling around his entrance.

Ichigo bit the bed to keep in a scream of mortification. How could Renji just  _do_  that? Didn't he care about germs? Wasn't he embarrassed too? Wow, that felt... Oh...

"N- Don't," he groaned, and Renji obediently stopped for a moment, giving him a chance to refuse again, but Ichigo didn't. After another second, Renji slowly leaned back in and gave him another long lick, humming lowly as if he enjoyed it.

Ichigo felt his eyelids fluttering. It was so sensitive, he couldn't believe it. Did other people do this? Renji was certainly a brave soul if he wasn't squeamish about it. That felt sort of nice, but god, it was weird. He couldn't remember the last time he'd been this embarrassed, but Renji wasn't making any mean comments, so Ichigo bore with it.

"Do you like that?" Renji asked, pausing again to make sure he wasn't pushing him too far. Ichigo lifted his head from the mattress, glaring back at him sharply, upset that he hadn't warned him about doing that beforehand. Renji held up a finger, looking at it and then to Ichigo's butt all too conspicuously.

"Don't you dare," Ichigo growled, blushing as he watched an evil grin spread over Renji's face. Renji sucked on his finger for a second, giving Ichigo plenty of time to kick him away before his hand approached. Ichigo didn't run; he couldn't let Renji think he was a coward. "Ah," he hissed as he felt Renji's finger against his asshole, prodding and then pressing in. He just about had a heart attack, freaking out so bad that Renji backed off.

"Okay, okay, fine, fine, fine," Renji said quickly, seeming to be more worried about spooking Ichigo again.

"It's fine," Ichigo growled against all his gut instincts. He'd show Renji. He could do this with him and make him happy. He could get through this. "I can take it," he said with conviction. Renji gave him a doubtful look.

"Okay." Renji inserted his finger again, twisting and worming his way inside despite all the interesting noises Ichigo made. When he tried to get two in, Ichigo told him just how that felt with a bunch of colorful swear words. "You wanna' keep going?" Renji asked, still not making fun of him. Ichigo nodded despite the weird foreign feeling, letting Renji try to get three fingers in.

That was far too much for him, and Ichigo was so tight and in pain that Renji couldn't even force his finger in if he'd tried. "You're not relaxing, Ichigo," Renji explained, pressing a teasing kiss to his puckered sore entrance after he pulled his fingers out. Ichigo had to wonder how Renji could do this with him with no feelings attached. He was trying so hard to feel nothing, but it just wasn't working. He wanted Renji to care about him, and there was no sense denying it.

"What's the matter? Want me to try this some more?" Renji asked, licking in a circle and then pushing his tongue inside a little bit.

Ichigo exhaled a huge breath, absolutely stricken as his eyes popped open. He didn't even know if he liked it or not. It was so intense and strange that it scared him witless.

As soon as he could speak again, he made it clear that this was the end. No more. He couldn't do this. It was just too much. Whatever this weird feeling was, this emotion, and this strange moment they were sharing... it felt like it didn't belong to him.

"What's wrong, I thought you wanted ta' do it, huh?" Renji asked, sitting back and letting Ichigo roll over onto his back and pull his pants up. Giving him a serious look, Renji leaned in near his face so they could talk. "Hm? What's the matter? You don't wanna' do it?"

"No," Ichigo said lowly, embarrassed that he'd chickened out. What bothered him more was that Renji wasn't teasing him or jeering at his failure. He looked concerned. Ichigo sighed. This was for the best. He didn't really want to be someone's conquest anyways. He probably should just wait until he got married.

"Why not?" Renji asked evenly, not disappointed or angry with him, which was reassuring.

"Because…" Ichigo felt the truth tumbling out of his mouth, bitterness welling up within him. He  _did_  want to do it, but he wanted Renji to want to do it too, and not just as a casual thing to pass the time. He wanted this to mean something!

"I don't want to be your stupid little friend with benefits," Ichigo said sharply. "I won't let you yank me around," he growled, glaring at Renji and his stupid face. Renji gave a little frown of confusion.

"I don't understand. It's not like anything else is there," Renji said in bewilderment, as if that were obvious. That just about broke Ichigo's heart. He'd known all along that this was how Renji had felt, but hearing it said like that was something else entirely. "I mean, neither of us want something else to be there, so... of  _course_  it's only for fun."

Feeling the blade twisting in the wound, Ichigo couldn't bring himself to say anything else, so hurt and upset that he just sat there in brooding silence. So, it was true then. This was just a game for Renji, just a way of getting off, not a bonding experience or anything substantial. His silence must have spoken volumes for Renji, because his eyes narrowed with suspicion and then widened with guilt.

"Wait," Renji said slowly. "… You _like_  me?" he asked incredulously, as if he was almost positive that he was wrong. Ichigo got pissed then, spitting mad in an attempt to salvage his secret.

"Pf- _No_ ," he said vehemently. "Who would like _you?!_  I don't like you," he snapped, "I  _hate_  you!" Renji obviously hadn't heard any of that, because he looked so guilty and sorry that it made Ichigo furious.

"Aw man," he said with that pitying tone that Ichigo hated. It told him so much more than Renji had said, and he couldn't bear to hear it.  _'Poor little Ichigo with his little feelings. Poor Ichigo who fell for someone who was just trying to keep it casual. Poor, poor Ichigo._ ' Oh, he would  _kill_  him.

"I didn't know," Renji said awkwardly, looking away and scratching at the back of his neck. "Hey," he said seriously, meeting his eyes in apology. "I'm sorry."

Ichigo grabbed him by the throat, giving him a death-glare as he squeezed warningly. "Don't you  _dare_  pity me."

Renji shook his head when Ichigo released his grip, still looking so apologetic that Ichigo wanted to explode. "It's not pity. You should've told me," Renji said, and Ichigo felt a flicker of hope, then.

"I didn't know you wanted someone to romance you. How was I supposed to know that you liked that stuff?" Renji complained, whining in disappointment as if this had been something critical that Ichigo should have mentioned so that he could've planned ahead.

Wait, did Renji…?

Renji looked so disappointed and distraught that Ichigo couldn't believe it. "I mean, I _tried_  to be nice to you and ask you out, but you said no. I thought having me be all lovey-eyed was freaking you out too much, so I stopped. You don't like that stuff, man, how else was I supposed to get you in bed with me?" That made Ichigo bristle inwardly, and it hurt even more now that he had begun to hope.

Ichigo gave a rough sigh, upset and wounded, "I don't want you to be a prince. I just wanted you to say you needed me. I just wanted to feel like you cared about  _me_  for one goddamn second, you asshole, but now I see that you're nothing but a big jerk," he continued, beginning to rant in his anger, seeing Renji's face fall, "and a dog who'd never be able to want anything but a casual fuck."

Ichigo's chest swelled with hate as he shouted in Renji's face. "You can just keep scrounging the streets, then, because I'm not gonna' be the one who waits up for  _you!"_

Renji was morose for a second, but then just shrugged, hands in his lap with a bland look on his face. Ichigo just gave a sullen sigh, surprised when Renji leaned in and kissed him ever so gently. It was so sweet and warm, so light that it would be impossible for any darker intentions to be laced within it.

"Sorry I hurtcha'," Renji said in answer to his little speech, not having taken any of it seriously. He could sense that Ichigo was lashing out at him out of anger, seeing straight through it. Ichigo just groaned lowly in irritation, blushing as Renji scootched over to him and put an arm around his shoulder.

"See? You don't like it when I'm sweet to you. I knew that if I was honest, it would scare you too bad, so I had to take another route. I thought that sex was all you might give me," Renji admitted, and suddenly Ichigo realized that this had all been a horrible misunderstanding. If Renji really thought that weasling sex out of him would be easier than trying to woo him, Ichigo had really done something to confuse him.

"I don't want you to want that from me though," Ichigo whined, heart breaking, finally letting his sadness show on his face. Renji looked like he'd hit a baby on accident. "That's all you were ever after?"

"I don't get where this is coming from. You turned me down, Ichigo," Renji said with a furrowed brow, looking to Ichigo's face. He felt ashamed all of a sudden, because Renji was right. He  _had_  rejected him, so what was Renji supposed to think? Had Ichigo honestly expected him to keep trying if he knew thought Ichigo didn't like him romantically?

"What was I supposed to think?" Renji asked honestly. Ichigo sighed, knowing that he'd been pretty stupid. "I asked you out, and you made it clear that you didn't like me that way. I see how you look at me, though, so I knew that you were attracted to me. When I said what I felt, it scared you away, so I gave you the option to have me with no feelings attached... even," Renji swallowed and cleared his throat, looking away, "even if it would break my heart."

Ichigo felt like he was hearing himself talk. That had been exactly what he'd been thinking about for the last few hours: sacrificing his body in lieu of feelings. What the fuck. Maybe they were both so stupid that they deserved each other.

"Well... I cared, and I thought you didn't, and... and I thought I would try being with you, because... I dunno', that's all I could get outta' you," Ichigo said shyly. Renji made an 'aw' noise, shoving him over.

"Stupid, why would you  _do_  that?"

"You did pretty much the same thing."

"It's not the same," Renji insisted, looking like he felt immensely guilty.

"It sort of is. I thought you just wanted to get in my pants," Ichigo admitted with red cheeks, looking down.

"I do," Renji said bluntly, causing Ichigo to scowl, but then he continued on shamelessly, casually saying, "But I love ya' too." Ichigo was silent for a minute, because this was what he'd wanted to hear, but it still didn't seem safe to lower his guard.

"Like… bro-love?" he asked, because Renji had said that far too nonchalantly.

"No," Renji said flatly, looking to him. Huh. Maybe Renji just wasn't as reluctant to say things out loud as he was. Renji was a brash honest person, and he had only curbed his feelings for Ichigo's sake, thinking that it made him feel uncomfortable. So, Renji really did like him back -  _l_ _ove_ him back. Ichigo hummed a little in surprise.

"Oh."

Renji let out a low snicker then. "Che'. You're too cute, kid," he mumbled, kissing his nose hard enough that Ichigo made a noise when the cartilage crinkled. Ichigo scowled, but he couldn't deny the ba-bumps in his heart.

* * *

_C'mere baby, I'll warm you up._


	3. Chapter 3

_Some say the world will end in fire;_  
_Some say in ice._  
_From what I've tasted of desire,_  
_I hold with those who favor fire._  
_But if it had to perish twice,_  
_I think I know enough of hate_  
_to say that for destruction, ice is also great  
_ _And would suffice._

* * *

After twenty minutes, Ikkaku couldn't deny that it was pretty chilly in here. Fuck, his hands were cold, and he was so goddamn horny that he felt like kicking straight through that fucking steel door and its stupid lock. Yumichika was still shivering in the corner, ignoring Ikkaku's teasing, and eventually, figuring Yumichika wasn't looking anyway, Ikkaku shrugged and whipped it out. Why should his whack-time be ruined?

Of course, Yumichika couldn't ignore his grunts of pleasure for very long, and made it clear just how disgusting and unfit for society he was. Ikkaku flushed pink with embarrassment, continuing on brazenly, glaring at Yumichika and daring him to do something about it. Yumichika scowled right back, narrowing his eyes and pursing his lips, the little brat.

"Don't masturbate in my direction," Yumichika snapped when Ikkaku's glare faded a little, turning hazy as his grip tightened, making it clear that Ikkaku was getting off on thoughts of him bent over something. "What is  _wrong_  with you?" Yumichika shrieked incredulously, throwing his hands in the air. "Do you have no shame?" That got to Ikkaku a little, the embarrassment returning. God, could Yumichika just  _shut up?_

"Hey, I saw it on a thousand ways to die! I don't wanna' freeze to death, you idiot," Ikkaku shouted, shoving his junk back in his pants when Yumichika wouldn't stop giving him that  _look_. As much as he wanted to continue to tick Yumichika off, he was admittedly insecure. "Besides, this is what I came in here to do. Why should I let you ruin it?" he jeered, giving a 'pssh'.

Yumichika raised an eyebrow, looking so unimpressed that it was alarming. Ikkaku grit out a sigh. He hadn't thought he could fall in Yumichika's opinion any more, but he'd gotten pretty good at it, hadn't he. "You come in here and jerk off on your breaks?" Yumichika asked, looking down his nose at him as he stood up and pulled his skinny arms inside his shirt for warmth.

The concrete couldn't have been comfortable to sit and pout upon, and Ikkaku was concerned to see that Yumichika's lips were blue. The poor guy probably didn't want to admit weakness, but Ikkaku could see that this was serious. Ikkaku should be the bigger person and share some warmth, but Yumichika was much too proud to accept it, and Ikkaku was too proud to offer it.

"Yeah," Ikkaku said back, spitting on the pavement and grinding his shoe on top of his phlegm. Yumichika's nose wrinkled at both the action and his statement. "Better than the bathroom," Ikkaku grunted, crossing his arms and leaning back against the steel door. Goosebumps were just beginning to rise on his own skin, and his ears were a little chilly, but he was still far better off than poor skinny Yumichika, whose teeth were chattering every time the brat forgot to hide it.

"Wow," Yumichika said flatly, giving Ikkaku a deadpan stare that really made him feel like an idiot. "You constantly amaze me." Ikkaku grit his teeth and glared at Yumichika, who continued on, raising his eyebrows. "I always think you and your behavior couldn't get more hideous, but then you just  _do._ "

Something snapped in Ikkaku then, all those months of tension and pain just finally bursting out of the over-stretched walls of his heart. "What, I'm not good enough for you?!" he shouted, glaring and baring his teeth in an attempt to intimidate Yumichika or draw some emotion from him. Couldn't he feel these flames? Couldn't he feel the red hot lava rock in his heart whenever he looked at him? How could Yumichika just ignore that? How could that bastard be so cold when he was over here  _burning?_

"No, you're not," Yumichika said calmly, voice so dry that Ikkaku felt like screaming. "You never were," Yumichika said pointedly, narrowing his eyes, each word punctuated with cruelty, stabbing Ikkaku deeper and deeper, "and you never will be."

Ikkaku let out a long groan that fully summed up their relationship until this point, an 'uugggh' that made him feel a little better even though he knew he wouldn't feel that his poor heart was avenged until Yumichika's head was cracked open against the floor. That bastard, that fucking bastard. How could he just….  _Ugh!_ Ikkaku could just punch the sarcasm right off Yumichika's stupid pretty face and hit him until he wasn't so sharp and mean. Why did Yumichika have to act like this? Why couldn't he just let Ikkaku in?

More importantly, how could you be pining so hard for someone but still want to bash their head in with a shovel? Was that what love  _was?_

Yumichika just snorted at his angry noise, turning his head to the side. Ikkaku could see that Yumichika's nose was pink and runny, that he was shivering violently, so violently that he could hardly stand because of his shaking abdomen, but he felt little sympathy right now. If that bastard was gonna' be so cold, then he could fucking freeze to death for all Ikkaku cared. He hoped that when they got out of here, Yumichika had to have his limbs cut off with a saw. Little jerk.

Okay, he didn't really mean that, but Ikkaku was so hurt and furious that he really felt like screaming in Yumichika's face and shaking him until he loosened up. Maybe fire could warm up the cold-hearted ones, but it didn't seem to work on an equally powerful force such as ice. They'd come to an infinite standstill, because Yumichika would not ask for help, and Ikkaku would not offer it. All that was left was to watch each other slowly corrode. Ikkaku would go up in flames of hatred and Yumichika would freeze bitterly, and they both would die because of their foolishness.

What a horrible prospect.

"Fuck you too, then," Ikkaku spat, and Yumichika stuck his nose in the air, sharing the sentiment. As Ikkaku turned away, he grit his teeth, swiping moisture from his eyes angrily. Didn't Yumichika feel anything? Ikkaku was hurting so badly inside and Yumichika still just stood there, unaffected. Would nothing get through to him?

Ikkaku let out a sigh then as he was met with resounding silence. It sounded like failure. Yes, it was time for him to give up. There was no way to get to toxic people like Yumichika, and there was no sense hurting himself over that. God, but it stung.

"Fine," he mumbled to himself, vengeful flames going up in smoke. "It's fine, then. You can be bitter over there in the corner, but I'm gonna' make wall shadows quietly if that's okay with you," he said with a bitter sarcasm even though he was altogether serious.

"Mhm," Yumichika replied after a moment of confused silence, watching Ikkaku sit in the corner and pass the time without paying attention to him. Suddenly he felt unfulfilled, seeing that he could no longer get under Ikkaku's skin. Without an opposing force, he felt purposeless. One thing he hated more than anything was to be ignored.

He had to admit, being alone was a sad, cold, lonely thing. Yumichika blinked, grimacing.

Maybe he'd been too harsh. The cold wind had blown too hard and put out the fire, and now he was all alone.

* * *

"C'mon, let's keep goin'," Renji then said eagerly, and Ichigo sighed, but he supposed that a few minutes of sweetness was all he could ask for.

"Wait, wait. What does this mean?" he asked, still trying to figure out where they were going from here. Renji looked like he hadn't considered the prospect since Ichigo had rejected him, but now his brow furrowed in thought.

"Ya' wanna' go out?" he asked. Ichigo was silent, pursing his lips, giving a sideglance. "With me?" Renji added. Still Ichigo said nothing, meeting his eyes suspiciously. "Just me? Exclusively?... Like  _dating?_ "

Ichigo still just sat there, thinking it over. Renji thought he was being obstinant, so he pinched his cheek. "Please? Be my boyfriend?" he whined, sticking out his lower lip. Ichigo gave a weary sigh, shaking his head.

"Heh'. You're so dumb. You wouldn't know what to do with a boyfriend. You seriously think you could keep your pants on? As if," he said sarcastically, rolling his eyes. A relationship between two hot-heads like them wouldn't work out anyway. He had to wonder for a moment what the fuck was wrong with him, because here he'd been pining for these exact words, but here he was pushing them away.

Luckily, Renji knew for sure now that Ichigo wanted him too, and he wasn't likely to let go easily.

"Uh,  _yeah_ ," he said in offense, swatting Ichigo upside the head. "What the fuck, I'm not some soggy waffle who starts drooling every time someone walks by. I can control myself!" he insisted. "I'm loyal!"

Ichigo made an indifferent noise, looking him up and down. He wanted to be absolutely sure that Renji wouldn't cheat if he let him into his heart. "Hm. I dunno'. I'm not convinced."

"Aw what?" Renji whined in exasperation. "I've gotta' win you over even  _more?_ " Truth be told, Renji had fun doing it, and he knew he would even more now that he knew that Ichigo was secretly willing.

"Yeah. I don't believe you," Ichigo said flatly. Renji had been so casual about the whole thing that Ichigo didn't really believe his words were genuine. "I don't feel it." Renji gave him a steely look and put his hands on both of his cheeks, leaning in and kissing him passionately, not too rough, but not too soft either.

Laying them down, Renji leaned over Ichigo, their noses brushing together as one hand left his face to caress his chest. Ichigo closed his eyes, arms coming up around Renji's neck as his blood was put on slow boil. Heating up, slowly but surely, the sweat between them became more and more annoying, keeping their skin sticking together.

Renji peeled Ichigo's shirt back, making a noise when Ichigo snapped his hair tie in half, letting his tangley red hair fall down over his sweaty shoulders. Renji looked up to him through his bangs, kissing Ichigo's stomach with a 'mwah' noise to tease him. Ichigo shoved his forehead with a snort as Renji grinned and kissed a path down into his pants, pulling the elastic back to continue downward over the sparse hair towards the top of his erection.

"Hmmm," Ichigo sighed, hand lightly resting on the back of Renji's neck, stroking through his hair as much as he could. The humidity caused his fingers to stick to his hair, which was tangled beyond belief today. Renji grunted when Ichigo's fingers snagged in it. "Sorry," he mumbled, rubbing Renji's scalp where he'd pulled too hard. Renji bit the front of Ichigo's pants teasingly as he pulled them down.

"You sure you wanna' do this?" Renji asked, sticking his fingers in his mouth and pressing them between Ichigo's legs, rubbing with more care than before, now that he didn't have to act like this was just for fun.

"Yeah," Ichigo gasped, his nerves coming back, but all the same, he rolled onto his stomach and pulled his own underpants down, backing up against Renji's hard stomach when he knelt behind him. Renji gave a low groan, big hands resting at Ichigo's hips, holding him there so he could grind against him. Ichigo bit his lip when he felt Renji's growing arousal pressing between his buttcheeks. What if he didn't like it? What if Renji got disappointed and reevaluated their new relationship? Ichigo  _had_  to do well at this. He had to prove that he was serious this time, that he really did want to start something with Renji.

"It'll be okay," Renji said lowly, as if he could sense Ichigo's nervousness. He leaned down behind him as Ichigo's chest and face lowered to the mattress, leaving his rear in the air. Ichigo was still beyond embarrassed that he was so exposed like this for Renji to see, but the uncertainty and sparks of fear turned him on like nothing else. Maybe that was Renji's whole allure to him: Ichigo knew that Renji was an equal match in strength and that he would keep him on the verge of being defeated. Ichigo would have to  _try_  to keep up with him, but he could also trust him to take control and not abuse his power.

Renji's hands were warm and careful on his butt this time, thumbs rubbing soothing circles as he leaned in and ran his tongue over his balls and up to circle around his asshole. Ichigo no longer felt as though he had to keep every little noise in, groaning tersely, brows furrowed. Renji probably wouldn't tease him anymore, so he let out little breathy noises and uncomfortable hums, seeing that Renji reacted accordingly based on what it sounded like he liked and disliked.

When Renji put his fingers in, Ichigo held his breath, really trying to feel and decipher whether or not he liked this. It was so  _wrong_  feeling at first, and when Renji started to pull his fingers in and out and hook them, it really didn't do anything for Ichigo. It didn't really  _hurt_ , but he didn't exactly like it either. "How's that?" Renji asked, and Ichigo replied that he didn't really know.

"It doesn't hurt, but… It doesn't really feel good. Is it supposed to?" he asked, sweating and panting as he tried to bear it. He honestly didn't know if gay sex was like that. Do partners take turns because only being on the top feels good? So their sexlife was just one big sacrifice?

"Of course it's supposed to feel good, you dipstick," Renji said in disappointment, growling at himself as he tried harder, worming his fingers in deeper. Ichigo grit his teeth. Oh, he didn't like that. He kept imagining Renji poking his organs or something. "I just need practice, is all," Renji grunted, and Ichigo suddenly relaxed a little, beaming. Renji wasn't as confident in the bedroom as he'd thought. Maybe he wasn't as prodigious as he'd expected. Renji might not have slept around at all, and even the possibility of that made him feel a lot better.

"It's fine," Ichigo groaned when Renji kept jabbing at his insides like he'd dropped his pick inside his guitar. Not very pleasant feeling. "You can keep trying. I'm probably just doing it wrong," Ichigo panted, sweat rolling down his brow. God damn, no wonder people avoid prostate exams. As soon as that occurred to him, he realized Renji was actually trying to find that. He probably already had, but Ichigo just wasn't used to the sensation.

"Oh, geez, this feels frickin' weird," Ichigo muttered when Renji lubricated his fingers and eased back in. It felt a lot better, but having liquid inside there made him immensely uncomfortable, because he couldn't control it when it trickled back out.

"It's not for everyone, I guess," Renji said with plain irritation at himself for failing to make Ichigo like it. "I guess you have to do it a couple times before it starts feeling good. You've gotta' get used to it, maybe." Ichigo asked him if he'd ever tried it, but Renji didn't answer him.

"Okay, I'm gonna' try three now, okay?" Ichigo nodded in response, holding his breath as Renji pulled back to ease in another fingertip. He remained still until Ichigo relaxed somewhat, and then slid his fingers back in. Ichigo groaned, clenching up around him.

"Ah," he panted, frowning and gasping when Renji started to move his hand. "Ow," he grunted.

"You okay?"

"Yeah, it's fine," Ichigo assured, swallowing hard when Renji pulled back, using the index fingers from each hand to pry him open so he could use his tongue more. Immediately, all his blood rushed downwards and he was a shuddering mess, whining into Renji's pillow. He had to admit that after being fingered, that felt really good.

"I think you're ready now," Renji announced, pulling his shorts down a little bit so he could free his erection and lube it up. "You sure you wanna' try this?" Renji asked. Ichigo hummed in uncertainty, but nodded, bracing himself against the bed.

"Go slow," Ichigo grit out, glaring over his shoulder at Renji, who looked alarmingly eager. " _Go slow!"_  he repeated when Renji didn't respond in due time. Renji nodded and leaned forward, holding Ichigo's hip with one hand, keeping his arousal straight with the other. Ichigo made a noise as the hot head of Renji's cock touched against his entrance, rubbing and pressing gently until Renji's pelvis pushed forward.

"Ah," Ichigo hissed through his teeth as Renji pulled his hips back, impaling him on his cock. "Ahhh," he groaned, face scrunching up, tensing in pain. Renji paused, waiting for him to get used to it. "Is it over?" Ichigo asked, gasping for breath. Renji explained that only the head was inside. Ichigo nodded, sweating, gripping the sheets and gritting his teeth as Renji counted to three, pushing in further. Holy hell, this hurt.

"Ah… Ow... _ow_ ," Ichigo yelled when his ass hit Renji's tensed abdomen. Renji gave a deep groan, holding his hips there as Ichigo hissed in pain. He could feel Renji's heartbeat pounding through his cock, which tensed inside him along with a low noise from Renji, which vibrated through his bones like fire. He'd done it, he'd really done it!

"How is it?" Renji asked, voice deep and husky, telling Ichigo that he was an inch from turning into a complete animal. He let out a slow exhale, running his hands over Ichigo's butt, squeezing and pulling him back as if he could get even further inside. He wanted friction so badly, but Ichigo was gripping him so tightly that it would be nearly impossible.

"It hurts," Ichigo groaned, "Fuck!" He shuddered and squinted in pain, biting a blanket and grinding his teeth. " _Rrrhg!_ " he groaned, giving a dry sob of frustration as he shoved his head against the mattress.

"You wanna' stop?" Renji offered, even though it was clear that he  _really_  didn't want to stop. "Ah fuck, you're so tight," he moaned, letting out another slow breath to gather some self control. "Is it bad? Hurt too much?" he gasped, speech devolving into smaller sentences as it became harder and harder to focus.

"No, I can take it," Ichigo grit out, moisture in his eyes as Renji grunted his approval and leaned over him, his hard chest pressing against Ichigo's sweaty back. Renji put one arm around Ichigo's stomach, holding their torsos together as his other hand held himself up.

"If you say so," Renji said in a strained whisper, kissing Ichigo's shoulder as he bucked his hips, groaning deeply. Ichigo cried out, shuddering at the tight fit and the sheer stretching that he'd gone through. This didn't feel right at all, but he knew he couldn't back out now. Renji would be so disappointed, and worst of all, Ichigo would feel like he'd let himself down.

Renji licked his free palm, hand sliding down to Ichigo's erection, fisting around it and pumping firmly. Ichigo relaxed a little, allowing Renji to thrust in and out of him, going so deep that he thought Renji was prodding his stomach from the inside. What hurt was mainly the very outside ring of muscle, which was still doing its best to choke Renji's dick.

"Mm, you feel so good," Renji rasped in his ear, jerking Ichigo off and kissing his bare skin as he thrust. "You doin' okay?" he asked, unable to see Ichigo's expression.

"Yeah, I can do it," Ichigo repeated through gritted teeth, holding his breath and shuddering in pain. This went on for a few more minutes, with Renji repeatedly asking if he was okay. Each time, Ichigo repeated louder that he could do this, and eventually Renji caught on that it hurt pretty bad.

"Dude, if it hurts this bad, you're supposed to say something. Don't try and spare my feelings," Renji insisted, pulling back. "I could actually  _damage_  you, you idiot! Do you wanna' be incontinent for the rest of your life, you dumb fuck?!"

Ichigo rubbed at his eyes, scowling as he rolled onto his back, holding his lower tummy. He groaned to himself, furious that he'd failed so horribly. "I have to do it!" he shouted, spreading his legs open and trying to drag Renji back towards him with one hand.

"Why?" Renji shouted back, upset that Ichigo hadn't said anything and had just let him keep going.

"Because," Ichigo said miserably, looking to Renji with a pitiful angry frown. Renji gave a little sigh, leaning forward and kissing him on the mouth.

"I'm not gonna' change my mind about you, dumbass. Now, you wanna' keep trying, or what?" Renji asked, scootching inbetween his legs and wrapping them around his waist, leaning down to peck Ichigo's nose.

Ichigo took a battle-ready breath, putting his hands at Renji's shoulders as Renji coated himself in lube again and pressed inside. It was considerably less difficult than the first time, but Renji took a full minute easing all the way in this time, being conscientious of Ichigo's comfort. "Try to relax, Ichigo," Renji said lowly, eyes hazy with pleasure. "Just try and calm down," he repeated, and Ichigo nodded even though that's what he'd been  _trying_  to do all along.

"It's so hard, though," Ichigo grit out, then trying to relax his stomach muscles and take slow breaths. Renji smiled a little, leaning forward until their chests were pressing together, Ichigo's half-erection trapped between them.

"Focus on something else, then," he whispered with a half-smile, kissing him on the mouth softly until Ichigo got into it again, trying to distract himself as Renji started thrusting, only pulling back a little bit before pushing back inside.

It took about five minutes for his muscles to finally calm the fuck down, by which point Ichigo was jerking himself off and kissing Renji hard. Renji was grunting in pleasure, holding Ichigo where his hips met his legs, thrusting as hard as he dared when Ichigo was finally starting to relax.

"It still doesn't feel good," Ichigo insisted, even though it didn't hurt so much anymore. Renji scowled, because he knew he was probably aiming wrong or something. "Should I move?" Ichigo asked, letting Renji pull out so he could get on his hands and knees again.

Renji grinned and got behind him, jokingly knotting his hand in Ichigo's orange hair and pulling him back against his hard body, making him straighten up. Ichigo gave a weary laugh as Renji's arms ran up over his slimmer stomach and chest, pinching his nipples as he kissed him over his shoulder.

Distracted with Renji's hot slick grip on his erection, he only half-noticed when Renji slipped back inside of him. There was another jolt of pain, which faded more quickly than it had before as Renji thrust into him with less caution. Ichigo could hear himself moaning as a smacking sound grew louder between them, their sweaty skin sticking as Renji thrust harder.

Still unused to the feeling of being so naked in front of someone, and worse than that, being _touched_ , Ichigo whined uncomfortably when Renji pressed his hard chest against his back and leaned over his shoulder to let his saliva drip down onto Ichigo's erection. He moaned a little when Renji pressed his face against his, watching himself jerk Ichigo off as he thrust slowly into him, going long and deep.

Ichigo was finally feeling it then. It wasn't completely enjoyable, and it definitely wasn't the same kind of pleasure he got from Renji's hand on his arousal, but he found that he wanted Renji to keep going, to keep thrusting into him.

His hands came back around Renji's sweaty back, fingers digging into the muscle of Renji's butt to pull him closer and tell him to keep going. Renji gave a low groan, wrapping his arms around Ichigo's chest and licking a trail up his neck, kissing when he made it to his ear. "Mm, you feel so good," Renji repeated, whispering in his ear how he loved to hold him like this.

Ichigo hummed in reply with a wary grin, laughing when Renji playfully pushed his head down into the bed, grabbing him and wrestling him onto his back again. Ichigo panted breathlessly as Renji licked a long trail from his bellybutton up over his chest and up his neck. Renji grabbed Ichigo's upper arms and held him to his chest as he flopped backwards, towing Ichigo with him.

Ichigo didn't know how to react being on top, but Renji didn't pause in thrusting into him, holding Ichigo's ass on either side, lifting him a little so he had room for his hips to move. Ichigo just leaned forward, putting a hand on the bed on both sides of Renji's face. He moaned and hissed in surprise when Renji thrust into him harder than before, quick and rough, but not so much that it hurt. Pleasure started to rise within him and Renji grinned as he watched a delicious flush build in Ichigo's face. Ichigo moaned, shocked to hear his own voice telling Renji to go harder, to kiss him.

Hunger was plain in Renji's eyes as he let out a low groan. His mouth latched onto Ichigo's throat as he sat up and adjusted Ichigo in his lap so he could push him onto his back. Renji's deep voice resounded in his chest as Ichigo gave a breathless laugh and dug his fingers into Renji's thighs to pull him in. Renji grinned distractedly, exhaling harshly as he hulked over Ichigo and spread his legs apart.

Renji thrust passionately then, hips rolling against Ichigo's as he moaned into the humid air. Ichigo dragged him down to him by the hair, kissing him tentatively as he panted into his mouth. Renji growled, getting rough and choppy in his movements as he clung to Ichigo and groaned. Ichigo grit his teeth, gasping in a mixture of pain and fulfillment when Renji thrust hard to fit his need.

Before he knew what was happening, Renji let out this strangled gasp and pulled back, jerking himself hard and quick, cum spilling over his fingers with a moan that made Ichigo blush. Renji sat down hard, breath growing thick and lethargic as his motions slowed. Ichigo let out a long sigh, heart slowing as he watched Renji's face twitch in pleasure and satisfaction.

He lowered his stiff legs and put his hands to his aching lower stomach, which felt strangely empty; Ichigo was glad for a break, holding his gut and lower back. He was already feeling pretty sore in there, thinking about taking some Tylenol. Renji gave a long low groan of contentment, looking into Ichigo's eyes with a lax lazy expression. Crawling over to him, he lay his heavy limp body down on top of him from the side, giving him a slow kiss. Ichigo sighed into it, feeling that Renji's mouth was clumsy and tired against his own.

"That was good," Renji mumbled appreciatively as he ran his hands over Ichigo's slim body with gentle affectionate motions. "Want me to finish you off?" he asked with a yawn, not waiting for an answer before he ran his tongue lazily over Ichigo's erection, sucking him into his mouth, beginning a slow torturous rhythm that didn't take long to get Ichigo going. Having been neglected for most of the time, Ichigo had a hard time switching back between the two different kinds of pleasure, wondering how it would feel to orgasm from being fucked. Renji's low hums and slow breaths vibrated his shaft enough to bring him back to the edge of endless oblivion.

"Renji," he gasped again and again, hand against Renji's head as he tried to warn him that he was going to cum. Renji pulled back and licked the head of his cock obscenely as if it were a popsicle, jerking Ichigo off against his tongue. The eye contact was what got Ichigo, and moaning, unable to help himself, he came, semen lacing itself over Renji's face.

Embarrassed but turned on, Ichigo put a hand over his eyes, moaning helplessly as Renji licked them clean and began peppering kisses on his cooling skin, avoiding his sensitive parts which were twitching from aftershocks. "Heh', whatsa' matter?" Renji teased, already back to his jerky attitude even though he was tired from his orgasm, which irritated Ichigo to no end. To tell the truth, he kind of liked it a little bit, too. "Creaming the face is a man's dream," Renji snickered, seeing Ichigo go completely scarlet.

"Yeah, yeah, just shut up." Renji nodded, still laughing a little to himself as he flopped down next to Ichigo, a heavy arm resting on his chest as he got comfortable next to him for a post-coital nap. "What are you doing?"

"Shut up. We're snuggling."

" _What_?" Ichigo asked incredulously, knowing this was an opportunity to tease Renji, but he was just too surprised to think of any worthy material.

"Be quiet. We're snuggling right now. No talking," Renji insisted flatly, not opening his eyes as he rested his face against Ichigo's hair. Ichigo just stared at the ceiling in confusion. They were sticky and disgusting and  _much_ too hot, but still Renji seemed to be adamant about taking a little rest like this, as if it were crucial bonding time. What a weird guy.

Ichigo snorted a little when Renji pecked his hair and rubbed his chest affectionately. "You're so gay," Ichigo jeered, laughing when Renji just slapped him and burrowed his face into his neck, biting teasingly and tickling him. Ichigo shoved him a little to make him cut it out, but made no effort to escape his embrace.

"Yeah, I am. Unless you wanna' dress up like a Sailor Scout for me," Renji suggested with a wicked smirk. Ichigo immediately went quiet and crossed his arms, letting Renji cuddle him to his heart's content. There was no  _way_  he was wearing a skirt.

Renji hummed a little bit, resting his head against his shoulder and holding his hand sweetly, thumb rubbing over his knuckles. Ichigo didn't get how Renji could be such an obnoxious jerk but still act like this, but he didn't think about it, closing his eyes and letting the post-orgasmic bliss settle over him in a heavy hot wave.

Nudging Renji with insistence, Ichigo continued shoving him until he grunted in reply to prove that he wasn't yet asleep. He made sure it was completely clear that if he heard one word about Renji bragging that he'd gotten into his frosty virginal pants, he was a dead man.

Renji just gave a low laugh, not opening his eyes as he teasingly squeezed Ichigo's butt.

"Hey!"

* * *

_Farewell powdery paradise;_  
_We'd rather skate on the thinnest ice._  
_Fingers failed us before they froze,_  
_and frostbite bit down on all our toes._


	4. Chapter 4

_Sometimes it snows, and when it hails,_   
_I think the weather's bad._   
_But when the frost is in my nails,_   
_I think I might go mad._

_Snow as it might, blow as it will,_   
_My fiery heart, it will not kill._   
_Try as it might, try as you may,_   
_you shall not take my heart away._

_Even in the blackest blizzard, even in hell nine,_   
_my heart will give me warmth to spare and thoughts that you are mine._

_-Hadenxcharm_

* * *

As another hour or so passed, Ikkaku's anger faded to a low simmer. He'd run out of hand animals to make against the wall, and his fingers were sore from trying to bend them to make new ones. He had to admit he was starting to feel bad when he heard Yumichika shivering over there and breathing onto his cold hands.

Ikkaku was pretty cold too, but he was a natural radiator. His chest was big and warm, although he was starting to shiver hard. Yumichika, however, with his slim body type and fast metabolism, was shaking like a leaf, hands almost purple from how cold he was.

"C'mon, man, lemme' help you," Ikkaku finally offered, squatting down next to him in concern. "I saw that freeze-to-death episode on TV and it's  _not_  pleasant... Ya' know, if we do it, we'll survive," he suggested half-hopefully.

"No way," Yumichika said vehemently, shoving him back. Ikkaku shrugged, figuring that Yumichika would be proud damn near to his death. "We'll probably be rescued soon, and when we get out, I will not live knowing that I stooped to 'doing it' with _you!"_  Ikkaku rolled his eyes, rubbing his hands over his own ears in circles, breathing into his palms and sliding them together. He was pretty sure Yumichika might feel differently once he saw how serious this was. He just had to wait until Yumichika gave in.

Ikkaku smirked and got comfortable. He was patient as fuck; sooner or later, Yumichika would come around and then he'd get to snuggle the little shit until they were rescued.

Yumichika shuddered and stuck his hands in his armpits, curling up in a ball. Ikkaku nudged him, honestly concerned for his health. "Dude, you're gonna' lose your limbs. Ya' can't sit there on the floor," he insisted, because there was frost and ice crystals lining the steel shelves. Yumichika was just making things worse by pouting over there alone. "C'mere," he offered, opening his arms up, but still Yumichika cringed away from him, kicking him hard to keep him back.

"No, don't," he hissed, but Ikkaku ignored the little bugger, dragging him into a hug as Yumichika kicked and clawed at him as much as he could with his stiff limbs. "Stop touching me," he spat as Ikkaku forcibly pet his hair and pressed his face to his chest.

"Geez, shut up," Ikkaku insisted, rubbing Yumichika's skinny arms to try to gather warmth. Whatever he could get to build up between them disappated immediately. Yumichika was too skinny to retain heat, and Ikkaku grit his teeth, digging deep when he explained again that they should probably do it or they wouldn't be able to warm up.

"No, get off me!" Yumichika shrieked when Ikkaku grabbed his belt, trying to worm his hand inside. Ikkaku shrugged, letting go.

"Pssh, fine, then at least do it yourself," he pressed, "I won't watch." He smirked a little and closed his eyes, hearing Yumichika give a belabored sigh. Yumichika started muttering to himself in a hateful bitter little rant about how he couldn't  _believe_  he was stuck in here with him and that he had to do this to live, and why on earth did it have to be  _him_  out of every other man on the planet?

"Pft, so you've finally smartened up, then?" Ikkaku asked, peeking at Yumichika, who was sitting in a huff with his arms crossed, glaring at Ikkaku. Yumichika gave a tense nod, seeming to hate every second as Ikkaku grinned wolvishly and got on top of him, kissing him clumsily.

"Uhk, get off," Yumichika whined, pushing his face back as Ikkaku's hands slid up inside his shirt. Ikkaku backed off, grunting as Yumichika's hand cruelly grabbed the crotch of his jeans and squeezed sadistically tight.

"Ah, ow-ow-ow," Ikkaku hissed as Yumichika towed him forward with a glare. "Geez, was that necessary?" Ikkaku muttered as Yumichika hit him in the stomach and practically ripped the zipper of his pants open.

"I hate you," Yumichika confirmed aloud, making sure Ikkaku knew that he was only doing this because he had to.

"Yeah, yeah, get against the wall," Ikkaku muttered, rubbing his sore crotch and appreciating the view. It was already an improvement with Yumichika facing the other way. He didn't have to see his smug hateful face. Taking a good long look at Yumichika's butt, Ikkaku casually reached out and grabbed it, squeezing a little until Yumichika turned around and slapped him.

"Fine, I'm goin', I'm goin'," Ikkaku mumbled. Yumichika unbelted his own pants, pulling them down only as far as necessary, shivering violently. He looked so ashamed that Ikkaku was there immediately, slipping his big arms around his chest and holding him to his warm torso, pressing a kiss to his neck absently. Yumichika grunted and writhed in his arms to make it clear that he didn't want to be held, but allowed it because of the comforting warmth that immediately seeped into him. Ikkaku's hot breath and his body heat was admittedly welcome against his chilly skin.

"Make this quick," Yumichika said through gritted teeth, bracing his forearm against the sharp points of the ice on the wall. Ikkaku grunted in reply, pulling his erection out of his boxers, spitting into his palm. Yumichika licked his own fingers and stuck them inside himself, making an annoyed noise when Ikkaku leaned back to watch. "Hurry up," he gasped, regretting it instantly with a groan of pain as Ikkaku plunged into him thoughtlessly, pushing in too fast and too far.

"Ah," he hissed, but went quiet as Ikkaku started thrusting with wanton, enjoying himself all too obviously. Eventually, it became clear to Ikkaku that Yumichika was holding his breath like he would die if he exhaled. Seeing his tightly gritted teeth, Ikkaku stopped abruptly in surprise when he realized that he'd hurt Yumichika. Suddenly remembering that he should have prepared him for at least ten minutes, he was extremely impressed by the silence. Yumichika could really take a-

"Move," Yumichika demanded, knowing that Ikkaku had caught on. "What are you doing just sitting there?" he snapped, and Ikkaku guiltily began moving again, much more slowly. He knew that he had to be hurting Yumichika, but the little brat was hiding it so well that he was tempted to rut pretty hard and see how much he could bear.

"Does that hurt? Was that too rough?" he asked apologetically, rolling his hips slow and deep, with enough focus and care that he could almost pretend that they were lovers were it not for the hell flames in Yumichika's eyes. To his surprise, Yumichika grit his teeth in pain but gave him a spiteful smile.

In a raspy tight voice, Yumichika insisted that it hadn't been rough  _enough_  and that Ikkaku would never get a girlfriend. Ikkaku got so mad that he couldn't speak, thrusting into Yumichika hard, causing him to gasp in pain and get shoved up against the wall. ' _Yeah, that's what you get, you jerk_ ,' Ikkaku thought bitterly, pounding into him like he was tenderizing meat, being intentionally rough, slamming his face into the icy wall.

He could feel Yumichika's skin heating up the longer this went on, and before he knew it, they were both sticky with sweat. Yumichika sounded like he was choking from the effort of keeping his voice in check, and Ikkaku's irritation faded as the pleasure built.

He'd make Yumichika admit he was good. This was payback for all the pain and misery Yumichika had put them through. He'd make the little brat regret everything he'd said, so that he'd never be able to make fun of him again. Ikkaku would finally be able to hold one over on him. He'd beat him. He'd finally beat him.

"How da' ya' like that," Ikkaku growled, completely focused on the endless rythm of his body as Yumichika's face was repeatedly rammed against the wall. "Not so tough, now, are you," he grumbled, pressing Yumichika's head forward, shoving his face onto the crystallized ice embedded there.

When Yumichika pulled back, groaning in agony and turning around as far as he could, Ikkaku could see stippled blood and melting ice on his cheek, and he slowed in his rough rhythm a little, feeling queasy and unsatisfied. Hurting him just didn't feel right at all. Yumichika kept pushing his hips back against him despite the pain, insisting that he had to try harder or he'd never satisfy anyone, but it just killed Ikkaku inside to see how twisted and messed up this was. This would put a bigger rift between them than anything else. He couldn't let Yumichika turn him into the dark cruel little liar that he was. Ikkaku had a heart, and loving someone cold like Yumichika shouldn't turn him into a monster.

Still, Yumichika urged him on, insisting that he be rough whenever he touched him even remotely gently.

"Dude, you're gonna' bleed," Ikkaku warned when Yumichika reached back and dug his fingers into Ikkaku's ass, his nails pricking through his jeans. "Don't pretend that it doesn't hurt, you're not fooling me," he said in concern, "C'mon, stop it." Ikkaku felt like this was no different than rape, because he could feel Yumichika tensing in pain every time he thrust in, but still Yumichika bore with it without shedding a tear or crying out.

When Ikkaku refused to fuck him and continued rolling his hips slower and slower, Yumichika stooped to insulting his bedroom prowess and said that he didn't know what he was doing. To make matters worse, he gave him a sneer and spat, "I knew all along that you'd be bad in bed. You're barely large enough for me to even tell you're inside, and you probably cum quicker than the seconds on a toothbrush timer." Ikkaku saw red.

"Oh, I'll make you feel it." He thrust into Yumichika hard with one big  _smack,_  seething with rage as Yumichika's body tensed in shock. It wasn't enough to make him scream, though.

Ikkaku fisted a hand in Yumichika's hair much too tightly, feeling a few strands come loose as he ripped Yumichika's head back to bare his neck. Still, Yumichika would not cry or moan, and Ikkaku, in desperation to win this cruel battle, bit his shoulder and fucked him so hard that his own stomach was hurting every time it slapped against Yumichika's back.

"You wanna' feel something? You want pain, huh? Does it hurt?" he growled. Yumichika's eyes were closed and his mouth was open, seeming breathless from pain, but still he didn't speak. "What, is this what you want? You want me to hurt you?"

Yumichika still didn't break his façade, which just pissed Ikkaku off even more. Did Yumichika think he was better than him? Did he really think that he couldn't get to him, that he wasn't good enough to make him happy? Was there  _nothing_  that Ikkaku could do that was right in his eyes?

"Well, does it hurt?" he snapped, sticking two fingers in Yumichika's mouth roughly, squeezing his cheek and dragging his face around towards his. Yumichika's eyes were brimming with tears, but still he just glared at Ikkaku hatefully, biting down hard enough that Ikkaku swore and yanked his hand back. "It hurts, doesn't it? I got to you! So  _admit it_ _!"_

"No," Yumichika said in a whimpery gasp, body jolting from each rough thrust as Ikkaku dragged him away from the wall and shoved his head down on the cold pavement, hearing a dull  _thud_  as his forehead hit the ground. "No, I won't let you trick me," he breathed when Ikkaku paused for a moment and pulled back, planning on slapping his ass. Those words stopped him short, the embers of his rage calming down.

"Trick you?" Ikkaku asked, wiping his brow, already feeling the immense guilt creeping up on him when he saw Yumichika kneeling in front of him, limp against the ground with his sore and bruised entrance on display.  _He'd_  done that. He'd let Yumichika get under his skin so much that he'd turned into this horrible monster. It wasn't all that different from their vicious spiteful relationship up until this point, but this time Ikkaku had stooped to retaliating with physical violence instead of verbal cruelty. Yumichika's poison had seeped into him, and God, did the realization sting.

"What the fuck are you talking about?"

Yumichika shook his head, shivering all over, face indifferent. "I hate you, but some part of me wants to be around you." He was quiet for a second. "I like you," he said in a monotone, letting the resounding silence swallow the next minute as Ikkaku tried to think of something to say.

Ikkaku gave a weary exasperated sigh. "You're one vain piece of work, aren't you," he groaned. "If you liked me, then what the hell was all this for? Why'd you have to dump me and then be so cold for this long? What, is that what you  _want?_  You wanna' degrade me or something until I hate you? How is  _that_  supposed to make you happy?" he asked, voice high with incredulity.

Yumichika gave a tiny groan, pressing an arm against the cold concrete to try to lift his limp body. After a couple tries, he succeeded, slumping back against Ikkaku's body when Ikkaku took him in his arms, too weak to protest. He breathed heavily, letting Ikkaku hold him and warm him up. Desperate and confused, Ikkaku let out a breath, shaking his head. He'd really messed Yumichika up if he was this limp. Guilty and dismayed, he was still reeling over the newest development of Yumichika's confession, not receiving an answer.

"Is your pretty brain just fucked up or something? You're some sadomasochist?" he asked, not understanding, wondering why on earth Yumichika would have put them both through these months of pain just for some cruel game.

"I hate how you make me feel. I have never been more miserable ever since you came into my life." Yumichika blinked, "I can't stop thinking about you, and I hate it. I wish we'd never met."

Ikkaku huffed, regretting hurting Yumichika so badly, but not that they'd met. "C'mon, we'll talk about this later. Get your clothes on."

Yumichika's eyes were blank and distant as Ikkaku tried to get Yumichika's clothes back on. "Here, get inside," Ikkaku offered, lifting his shirt up and pulling it over Yumichika's head, leaving his smaller body inside, pressed up against his bare chest. Then he wrapped his arms around him and pulled his knees up, holding them in a ball, his erection dying as the cold minutes passed. His sweat began to dry, leaving him chilled and colder than ever.

"How can you be nice to me?" Yumichika asked dully, head resting against his collar bone. Ikkaku pet his head a little, seeing Yumichika's wide confused eyes, feeling that he'd gotten a little closer to melting his ice prince act away.

"That's what you do when you love someone," he said warmly, exhaling all the anger and frustration Yumichika had built within him. Yumichika was silent, but seemed to be accepting that and thinking about it.

Maybe all hope was not lost.

* * *

When they woke up from their impromptu nap and snuggle session, they were both so sweaty, sticky, and limp that it took them probably ten minutes to drag themselves to the bathroom for a cold bath to finally get some relief from the heat.

Lethargic and sore, Ichigo rested his head on Renji's muscled chest, his ear in the water that was lapping around the thick tattoos on his pectorals. Ichigo washed his own armpits and scrubbed his hair with some soap, while Renji lounged beneath him, taking up the whole tub with his long legs.

Renji was snoring annoyingly and Ichigo rolled his eyes with a yawn, trying to stand up and get out of the water. He felt squeaky clean after that soak, but he couldn't ignore the shakiness of his thighs and the pain in his backside. Renji really wasn't as good at this as the ketchup-head thought, and Ichigo gave a bitter grimace. He was lucky that Ichigo was too weak to kick him, the jerk, and Ichigo settled for splashing him in the face.

Renji woke up with a snort and a sputtering cough, flailing as water ran down his face in rivulets, sticking his hair to his shoulders.

Ichigo eased his way back into the tub, sitting gingerly on Renji's lap, gripping the sides of the bath for support as Renji reoriented himself and started rubbing on some bodywash to clean himself of sweat.

"Carry me to the couch, asshole! I wanna' watch TV," Ichigo demanded hotly, pissed and dismayed at the sharp throbbing pain going through him. Renji, that jerk. He'd broken Ichigo's ass, and Ichigo was so fucking pissed. They were never doing it again!

"Don't shout in my face! I'm right here!" Renji hollered back, with a scowl to match as water dripped out of his nose, still recovering from getting half-drowned by Ichigo earlier. "What's your problem?" he asked, when he saw Ichigo wincing and gritting his teeth.

"My ass hurts," he whined, hissing and rubbing himself against Renji for sympathy. Renji stuck out his lower lip in apology. "So now you've gotta' take care a' me," he said crankily. "Take responsibility, you jerk!"

"Fine, fine," Renji griped, pulling the drain and lurching out of the tub, practically flooding the bathroom floor as he dripped all over it carelessly. Stark naked, he pulled some towels out of the cupboard and held one out, ready to cover Ichigo when he got out of the tub.

Ichigo tried to stand, but scowled when he found that it hurt horribly. Not wanting to admit that he couldn't get up, he was glad when Renji set the towel down and grabbed him under the armpits, hefting him into a standing position and lifting him out to sit on the toilet-lid.

"Owww," Ichigo complained when Renji set his weight down too fast. Renji apologized and gave him a couple towels, drying himself off as well.

"Here," Renji offered, squatting in front of him and offering his back, "Get on and I'll take you to the closet."

Ichigo, mortified, kicked him in the back, knocking his forehead into the opposite wall. Renji cursed and punched him in the chest and Ichigo grabbed him by the hair, yanking.

"OW, fuck, cheap move, you shithead!" Renji screeched, immediately submitting when Ichigo pulled harder. "Fine, fine, ah, let go!"

"I'm not getting on your back, I'm  _naked,"_  Ichigo said, scandalized. "You have to carry me!" Renji grunted in response, tossing him over his shoulder like a potato sack, which wasn't what Ichigo had had in mind, but he didn't have time to complain, because the cooling wind against his feverish skin as Renji carried him down the hall felt really nice.

Renji helped him get dressed, not teasing him because Ichigo liked to think that they had more class than to make fun of each other when they really needed help. Renji did complain a lot, however, because Ichigo was limp and floppy, even though he was trying to help Renji out. Renji put on some shorts and a tank top, combing his hair out and wringing it out onto the carpet to Ichigo's chagrine.

"C'mon, try and get up," Renji grunted, taking Ichigo's arm and wrapping it around his shoulder, pulling him up. "It'll hurt more tomorrow if you just laze around all day." Ichigo bit his lip so hard that he could taste blood, taking shaky slow steps, legs still like jelly. God, his core muscles really hurt, and he felt like he'd journeyed a thousand miles by the time he got out to the couch.

Ichigo lay there pitifully after Renji handed him the remote, sighing peacefully when Renji moved a fan near him to relieve him of the oppressive humidity. Renji took responsibility like Ichigo had demanded of him, taking care of Ichigo and feeding him ice cream, kissing him after each bite even though Ichigo tried to dodge.

As much as Ichigo had yearned for this, Renji's sudden sweetness freaked him out a little. He didn't want to be hugged, even though Renji was being pretty lazy, insisting that he wanted to lay on the couch too, putting his arm around Ichigo. Not liking all the gay mushiness, Ichigo kicked him off onto the carpet and told him to stay there. Renji shrugged and got his hairbrush, brushing out his damp hair and picking out the snarls, eventually handing it to Ichigo to do for him.

"See, this isn't so bad," Renji mumbled as they watched a variety game show. "It's nice, right? Havin' me be nice ta' you? You put up a bunch a' fuss for nothing."

"Yeah right, You couldn't be nice even if you tried. You're a jerk," Ichigo said flatly, shoving Renji's head teasingly, regretting it when Renji bit his hand.

"Gimme' a kiss," Renji demanded, turning to him, pulling Ichigo up to his face because he couldn't sit up easily on his own. "Mm."

Ichigo grimaced, lying back. "Yeah, yeah."

"Love you."

"Be quiet, I can't hear the show," Ichigo said with a private grin as Renji tickled his foot.

* * *

_Which is easier to withstand, the cold or heat?  
Which would be more pleasant, when your death you meet?_


	5. Chapter 5

When Ikkaku and Yumichika were finally rescued by the five o'clock delivery guy who was there to push in a few boxes on a steel cart, they were huddling together, shivering and sniffling. Threatening the guy with death if he mentioned this to anyone but also thanking him for freeing them, Ikkaku walked Yumichika out into the blazing heat, feeling his nose start running.

The air around him felt like a nice warm hug, and Ikkaku grinned, rubbing his poor ears and his arms to get some friction going. Yumichika was quiet, wiping his nose on his sleeve, walking back to the employee lounge for a drink before he got back to work.

Explaining to their boss where they'd been and that they were going to stay for another few hours to make up the work they'd missed, Ikkaku milled around at the customer service desk in the paint section, wondering what Yumichika was doing. He didn't see him until it was about seven, when he headed back to get his wallet and keys.

Yumichika didn't speak to him, standing at the microwave with a canteen of pasta that he'd practically nuked, back to him. Ikkaku had hoped that things were different between them now, so he approached Yumichika, touching his shoulder, cringing when Yumichika flinched and moved away with his sizzling food.

"You feeling okay?"

"I'm fine," Yumichika said shortly, moving around him and sitting at the table.

"So… uh," Ikkaku asked as he twiddled his thumbs, waltzing up to him and nudging him to get his attention. "You wanna'… uh… go out?" he asked again. Why would Yumichika say no? They'd had sex, right? So...

Yumichika gave him a cold look.

"As graceless as ever. I think not," he said blandly, ignoring him and taking a bite of his meal. Ikkaku's shoulders slumped in disappointment, but he supposed that if that was what Yumichika wanted, then okay. He had to accept that. Hopefully they could still be friends. He'd make an effort to be nicer to the twerp, and move on from this.

"Okay," Ikkaku said agreeably, turning to leave, putting his jacket on and hanging his apron up. Just as the door opened, Yumichika stopped him, calling 'wait'. Ikkaku stuck his foot in the door, glancing back.

"Wait, I changed my mind," Yumichika said, standing behind him, hand lowering from where he'd just managed to stop himself from touching Ikkaku's back. Ikkaku tried really hard not to look smug, although it was true that he was surprised that Yumichika had actually acknowledged that he'd made a mistake. It was clear that Yumichika was digging deep to do this, and Ikkaku didn't dare make fun of that, no matter how much he wanted to.

Ikkaku looked at him, as if to inquire whether he were serious or if he meant it, and Yumichika scuffed his foot on the ground. Ikkaku could see it was hard for him to put his pride aside and just waited patiently. Yumichika cleared his throat, eyes closed, raising his eyebrows as he imperiously stated, "Kiss me."

Ikkaku grinned and leaned in. Yumichika puckered up, but Ikkaku meanly dodged and pecked him on the nose instead. Yumichika scoffed and rolled his eyes, sitting back down at the table to eat his mac and cheese while it was still hot.

"Hey, so… Why were you always so mean to me, then?" Ikkaku asked, just trying to get everything straight. Yumichika gave a belabored sigh, looking up to him. His eyes were still cold and hesitant, but Ikkaku could see fondness there now.

Sounding put-upon, Yumichika raised an eyebrow. "If you hadn't been abe to deal with that, how would you have put up with me if we were together?" he asked with a little smile, eyes distant. "You see, you think because I'm beautiful, I'm a good person too, but that isn't right at all." Ikkaku blinked, pursing his lips, then giving a long groan, shoving Yumichika's face a little when he came over to him and squatted to bring him to eye-level.

"You fucking idiot," Ikkaku said bluntly, causing Yumichika some alarm. He looked shocked for once, his calm cruel visage having melted to one of hopeful hurt. "I  _know_ you're a jerk. I know you're mean and callous and that you have no common decency for others. I knew that and I still asked you out. What the fuck were you doing? Trying to  _protect_  me?" he asked bitterly, glaring at him. "I fight my own battles, Yumichika. Don't you dare do that again, or I'll kill you," Ikkaku said darkly, and he meant every word of it.

Yumichika let out a little breath, looking off, deep in thought as if he were surprised that he'd been so wrong about someone.

"Wanna' try this again?" he asked, less harshly. Yumichika was silent, still mulling things over or perhaps so far off in thought that he hadn't heard him. "Hey Yumichika," he said with the same tone he'd had when he'd first asked him out. "I like you. We should probably be boyfriends. Wanna' come to dinner with me?"

Yumichika bristled then, glaring coldly, not liking Ikkaku's confidence. "Eating dirt would be more satisfying," he replied in a monotone, just as he had before. Ikkaku raised an eyebrow, leaning in closer.

"Where are we goin' out to eat?"

"We're not going out, I hate you."

"Great, and at what time?"

"Go die an ugly and miserable death," Yumichika forced out, voice strained and hopeful as he looked to Ikkaku's face, as if in disbelief that such a person could exist. Ikkaku just grinned wider, because this time he could plainly hear the difference between what Yumichika meant and didn't mean.

"Awesome, I can't wait." He pet Yumichika's hair. "See, that wasn't so hard."

Yumichika laughed a little bit, low and bitter as he stood up and got his jacket. "You're a charmer, Madarame Ikkaku." He lingered in the doorway as he waited for Ikkaku to get his car keys and wallet, and as Ikkaku grinned at him and passed by him, stopping in the doorway with him, Yumichika stuck his nose in the air, walking away, pinching his ass on the way by.

"Hey!" Ikkaku shouted.


End file.
